Love Longed For, Love Found
Part 6
Posted: February 8, 2008
Title: Love Longed For, Love Found
Author: Tena
*****
Legolas and Haldir had a very happy reunion, each assuring the other that they had missed them more. Elladan and Elrohir shook their heads at the lovers while they visited with Saelbeth.
“Did you meet Mithrellas?” Elladan asked.
“Who is Mithrellas?” Legolas asked, in between kisses.
“Gildor’s wife,” Elrohir replied.
“What? Gildor is married? To an elleth?” Legolas said incredulously.
Haldir grinned. “Yes, to an elleth. A very beautiful elleth. I cannot believe you did not meet her. Was she not with Gildor when you arrived?”
“No, she wasn’t and no one said anything about him being married.”
Saelbeth cleared his throat. “You really did not give anyone a chance to tell us anything, my prince. As soon as we were shown to our rooms, you asked to be allowed to come and meet Haldir.”
“That is true. Well, I will make sure to introduce myself when we get back,” he returned to kissing Haldir. “I still cannot believe Gildor is married. She must really be special to have hooked Gildor Inglorion.”
Haldir exchanged a somewhat worried look with the twin, which was not lost on Saelbeth. When Haldir and Legolas were distracted with each other again, Saelbeth whispered. “What is going on? Should I be worried?”
Elladan leaned close to him. “I do not know, Saelbeth, but I hope there is no reason for anyone to be worried.”
The next afternoon, Thranduil and Gildor stood on the steps waiting for Legolas and the twins to arrive. Thranduil was visibly nervous, so Gildor placed a comforting hand on his arm.
“King Thranduil, be at ease. He will know something is wrong with one look at you.”
“I know, Gildor, you are right, but I fear his reaction. Please follow my lead. Let me decide when to tell him.”
“Of course, sire.” Gildor looked up as they arrived.
Legolas bowed slightly to his father and then hugged Gildor. “I have just learned the most wonderful news, meldir. Why did you not tell me you were married? That is wonderful! Congratulations, my friend.”
Gildor smiled brightly. “Thank you, Legolas. I am very happy.”
“Well, when do I get to meet her, or are you keeping her hidden away?” Legolas laughed.
“I look forward to introducing Mithrellas to you. Perhaps this evening before dinner.”
“I cannot wait to meet her. Have you met her, ada?”
“Yes, I have and she is lovely.” Thranduil smiled, trying not to let his nerves show. “Haldir, it is good to see you again. Too long has it been since you visited us.”
“Indeed it has, my lord. I hope to remedy that by returning to Mirkwood with you. If I have your leave, of course.” Haldir bowed respectfully. He was encouraged to see the king and Gildor together, so he assumed the initial meeting went well.
“You are welcome any time, Haldir. You do not need my leave.” The king turned to Legolas. “After you have rested, I would like to talk to you, my son. May I come to your chambers? I do not want to intrude on your time with Haldir.”
“ Ada, you could not intrude. Yes, give me time to bathe, and then I would welcome a talk.” They smiled and hugged before separating and going into the house.
After some reassurance from Elrond, Glorfindel and Erestor, and a large goblet of wine, Thranduil stood outside Legolas’ door. It was quiet inside and he hoped he was not interrupting them. He took a deep breath and knocked.
Legolas smiled when he opened the door. “Good evening, ada.” He stepped aside, closing the door behind his father. “Would you care for some wine?”
“No, thank you,” he said and looked at Haldir who was sitting quietly.
Legolas’ lover stood. “I can give you some privacy if you would prefer, King Thranduil.”
The king shook his head. “No, please stay, Haldir.” Thranduil waited for a moment, trying to summon his courage.
Legolas watched his father and became concerned. “ Ada, is something wrong?”
“I hope not, Legolas. There is something I need to tell you.”
“Tell me. What is it, ada?”
Thranduil was facing his son, but looking at the floor. He lifted his head slowly. “Faelivrin.”
Legolas’ eyes went wide. “What about her? I thought she had sailed.” Legolas started pacing and his voice was getting louder. “Is she here?! Why have you said her name, ada?”
Haldir could not believe the change in his lover just from hearing the name. Thranduil sighed. “Legolas calm down. No, Faelivrin is not here…she…” Thranduil fought to keep from breaking down. “Faelivrin did not sail.” He just could not bring himself to say the words. He felt like he would die if he said it.
“So she lied, just waiting until she could contact you!” Legolas’ temper flared. “She was not only a whore, but a liar as well.”
Haldir was about to shout but Thranduil beat him too it. “Legolas! Not another word. She did not sail because she never made it to the ships. She faded, Legolas. Faelivrin is dead.”
“Good” Legolas said under his breath, but Haldir heard him.
“Legolas! What is the matter with you? How can you speak of the dead that way?”
“You did not know her, Haldir. She wove her web and caught whoever walked into it.”
Thranduil had had enough. He was beginning to care little for his son’s feelings. He had to say it and be out with it. “Legolas, Faelivrin was pregnant. She gave birth before she faded.”
Legolas was astonished as he turned to his father and narrowed his eyes. “Are you telling me that the spawn of the whore has showed up and dares to contact you?”
“Legolas, I will not have you speak of my daughter, your sister that way. You do not even know Mithrellas.” Thranduil was standing face to face with his son.
Legolas laughed. “Mithrellas? Gildor’s wife? Oh that is rich, ada. Your whore’s child married your enemy. That is perfect.” Legolas never saw his father’s hand coming as it slapped his face. Legolas landed on the floor, clutching his cheek.
Thranduil was fuming as he stood over his son, hands balled into fists. Haldir stood next to him, shocked by what had happened. “Legolas, I am sorry I indulged you for so long. I should have slapped you sixty three years ago. Maybe then, Faelivrin would not have left, would not have had to travel while she was pregnant, and she would not have faded from grief, leaving my daughter, your sister to be raised by mortals. I was hoping this could be a happy meeting between the two of you, but I will not have you insulting her as you did her mother. She is innocent in all of this. She did not ask to be born, but she was and has been denied her place in our family long enough.”
Thranduil no longer hid the tears that threatened to fall. “She was the love of my life, Legolas, and Mithrellas is my daughter. I love you, my son, but I will not have you speak of either of them that way again.” He turned to Haldir. “I am sorry, Haldir.”
Haldir shook his head. “Do not apologize, sire. If you had not hit him, I would have.”
Thranduil looked back at Legolas and sighed. He knew things might never be the same between them again, but he could see no other way. “I am sorry, my son.” Thranduil walked sadly from the room.
Haldir squatted next to Legolas, handing him a napkin to wipe the blood from his lip. “I do not even recognize you, meleth. How could you speak that way of Mithrellas? You have not even met her.” Haldir stood, waiting for some response from Legolas. When his lover remained silent, Haldir walked to the door. “I need some time to think. I will be back later.”
Legolas watched him walk out the door. “Faded…and still making my life miserable.”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Mithrellas sat across from her father at the evening meal. She could tell something was wrong, and assumed it had to do with Legolas. While everyone was talking, she took his hand across the table. “It did not go well?” She whispered.
Thranduil smiled. “Give him time, Mithrellas. He is just in shock.” He squeezed her hand, more for his own reassurance.
Their meal was finished and Gildor smiled and nodded as Mithrellas whispered to him. “That is a good idea.” Thranduil was talking to Lindir, and seemed a bit more at ease. “King Thranduil, would you care to come back to our chambers for a drink before retiring?”
“That would be lovely, thank you. I will be along shortly.” He smiled and winked at his daughter.
Mithrellas and Gildor walked out of the dining hall as Legolas rounded the corner. He stopped quickly when he saw Gildor, knowing the ellith on his arm must be Mithrellas. Mithrellas noticed him and stopped. She smiled before continuing closer to him. “Prince Legolas, I have been looking forward to meeting you.”
Gildor watched Legolas closely. “Legolas, this is Mithrellas, my wife.”
Legolas smiled pleasantly and took her hand. “It is very nice to meet you, Mithrellas. I have heard so much about you.”
The way he smiled and held her hand made Mithrellas very uncomfortable. She was not sure why, but everything about him seemed anything but sincere. Gildor squeezed her hand. “Legolas, your father is going to join us shortly for a drink in our chambers. It would be lovely if you could come as well.” Legolas and Mithrellas had not taken their eyes off each other. Each seemed to be challenging the other.
Mithrellas cleared her throat. “Yes, it would be nice to get to know you better.”
“Thank you, I may just do that. I need to find Haldir though.” He began to walk around them.
“Well, he is welcome too, of course,” Gildor called to him.
Legolas waved as he left them. “Just as fake as her mother,” he grumbled as he headed to the dining hall.
Gildor and Mithrellas continued to their room. “I do not think he liked meeting me.”
“Meleth, he was very nice I thought.” Gildor sighed as she walked into the bathing chamber.
“I suppose,” she said.
When Thranduil bid them goodnight, Mithrellas was rather relieved that Legolas had not come to join them. The evening had been very enjoyable as she talked to her husband and father about plans for the upcoming festival. She had been very busy helping with the preparations and was excited to see it all come together. The fact that meeting her father had gone better than anyone had expected made it all the more wonderful. Now, if she could just avoid her brother, all would be well.
Haldir had forgiven Legolas’ behavior, but was still shocked by his lover’s anger at Mithrellas’ mother. Haldir had taken a chance, while Legolas was helping Elladan and Elrohir with setting up tables, to talk to Thranduil.
“What can I do to help him, sire? I have never seen him like that before. It has been days and neither of you have spoken to each other. He is polite to Mithrellas, but other than greetings, they have not spoken more than a few words either. It is a very uncomfortable situation.”
“I know, Haldir, and I appreciate your concern, but like you I have no idea how to deal with the situation. I fear trying to force Legolas. He is angry enough, and I do not want to alienate him further. I know Mithrellas is uncomfortable around him; it is written all over her face even though she tries to hide it. I just hope we can get through the festival and then return home. I will come to visit my daughter when I can and perhaps when Legolas is visiting you in Lothlorien, Gildor can bring her to Mirkwood. This is not how I had hoped this would go, but I see no other choice.” Thranduil said as he looked sadly over the garden they were sitting in.
Haldir sighed, feeling frustrated he could not make things better for anyone. “It seems that once again you are sacrificing your happiness for your son.”
Thranduil shrugged. “It is what a parent does, Haldir.”
“That is not how it should be when your child is now an adult.” Haldir could feel the anger rising in him again; anger that Legolas would not sacrifice for his father’s happiness. That he could not put his pettiness aside for someone else’s sake and Haldir wondered if Legolas would sacrifice for him if he needed him too. They had had a very peaceful fifteen years together; the only sacrifice had been time apart and that they were both making. Legolas’ recent behavior had Haldir doubting.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Thranduil found Mithrellas gathering leaves to spread on the tables inside. “There you are, Mithrellas.”
She turned and smiled as he approached. “Yes, you have found me,” said as she smiled and enjoyed his embrace. “What did you need?”
“I have made a decision, but thought I should clear it with my children first.”
Mithrellas eyebrows rose on her forehead. She was getting used to him calling her his child or daughter, although she had yet to call him Ada. “What decision?”
“I would like to introduce you as my daughter at the festival. Everyone can see the resemblance and our spending time together has made your relation to me obvious, but I wanted to make it official. What do you think?”
Mithrellas’ smile did not reach her eyes. “I am very proud to be your daughter. To know that you and my mother truly loved one another, and that you still love her and miss her means more than I can tell you…” she hesitated. Mithrellas did not think Legolas had given his approval and doubted he would. “What did Legolas say? Have you asked him?”
“No, not yet. I wanted to make sure you would like for me to acknowledge you first.”
“I would be proud to stand with you and let everyone know that I am your daughter and Legolas’ sister, but I do not think my brother would share our enthusiasm.”
“He just needs sometime, pen melui.” Thranduil cupped her cheek.
“If you think it is wise, I would be happy for everyone to know I am your daughter.” She laughed as her father scooped her up and swung her around. “I wanted to thank you for something else,” she said as he put her down. “Thank you for the way you are treating Gildor.”
Thranduil smiled. “I am quite ashamed of myself. I let others’ prejudices impact my thinking. I never gave Gildor a chance. I knew I needed to get to know him and am glad I have. He is quite intelligent, as more stories to tell than I do, and he adores my daughter. He treats you like the princess you are.”
Mithrellas grinned. “It does not bother you that he is older than you.” She was fighting hard not to laugh.
Thranduil groaned and shook his head. “Let us not talk about that.” Laughing, he began helping her gather more leaves into her basket.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
“Are you sure you want to do this, ada?” Legolas asked. Furious at what his father was asking of him, but with Haldir sitting in the room, he did not want to risk pushing Haldir away.
“Yes, Legolas, she is family and I want it known by all. Will you stand by me?” Thranduil was nervous, but determined to do this.
“Aye, I will stand with you.”
Thranduil smiled brightly and hugged his son. “Thank you, my son, thank you. You have made me very happy.” They bid each other good night.
Haldir embraced his lover. “I am proud of you. Come let us take a walk.”
Thranduil was sharing the happy news with Gildor and Mithrellas. He seemed so happy, but Mithrellas did not believe that Legolas was so happy about the situation. Gildor and Thranduil went to the Hall of Fire for a drink and Mithrellas stayed behind. She smiled as she watched her husband and father walking down the hallway, laughing together. Her world would be perfect if she could somehow get close to her brother. She really wanted to get to know him and understand him, but she just did not know how to proceed. She did not want to do anything to cause more problems, knowing that it would cause her father anguish. She would just have to figure out how to handle her brother.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The festival was in full swing, music was everywhere in the valley as were revelers. Gildor and Mithrellas were walking along the booths set up by artisans and peddlers. Gildor had found a knife he was looking at buying and Mithrellas was playing with a few elflings that were running about. Legolas saw them and stopped walking. Haldir noticed his lover was no longer with him and turned to see what he was looking at.
“Would you like to say hello?”
Legolas did not, but he would not make a scene in front of everyone. He nodded. They approached the couple. Gildor noticed them first as Mithrellas was kneeling down helping an elfling up that had fallen.
“Good day, Legolas, Haldir.” Gildor smiled.
“Good day to you, Gildor. Hello, Mithrellas.” Haldir said and Legolas smiled.
Mithrellas stood, holding the elfling. “Hello, Prince Legolas, Haldir. It is a beautiful day is it not?”
Haldir tickled the elfling and laughed as it squirmed in her arms. “It certainly is a beautiful day. We could not resist venturing out.”
Mithrellas looked at Legolas. “How are you today, Prince Legolas?”
“I am well, thank you. Is that your child?” Legolas smirked.
“No, her parents are friends of ours. This is Noruil. Noruil, this is Haldir of Lothlorien and Prince Legolas of Mirkwood.”
The elfling blushed and ducked her head in Mithrellas’ neck. If there was anything other than Haldir that Legolas could not resist, it was a child. “Hello there, little one.” Legolas prodded.
Nouril shyly peaked at Legolas, smiled and then looked at Mithrellas. “You look like him.” The elfling pointed at Legolas.
Mithrellas and Legolas looked at each other for a moment. Gildor and Haldir were each holding their breath, waiting to see what would happen. They were relieved when Mithrellas spoke.
“I think he is far fairer than me, pen dithen.” The elfling seemed to consider what Mithrellas had said for a moment, looking from one of them to the other. Nouril’s mother called for her and the elfling scrambled out of Mithrellas’ arms.
Once on the ground, she looked back at the siblings. “No, the same.” She ran to her parents who waved at the group.
Haldir wrapped his arm around Legolas’ waist. “That one will be a diplomat.”
Mithrellas chuckled. “Her father is on Lord Elrond’s council. She has learned well.”
Legolas cleared his throat. “Well, we have some browsing to do. I am sure we will see you later.” He said, and then abruptly walked away.
Haldir frowned, watching Legolas walk away. “Have a pleasant afternoon.”
“You too, Haldir.” Gildor tried to smile. He pulled Mithrellas to his side. “Shall we continue?” She kissed his cheek and nodded. Gildor was beginning to think his wife was right about her brother. Legolas was certainly not making much of an effort to get to know her. He wondered if he should talk to the prince.
Haldir was at the end of his patience with Legolas, but he waited until they had returned to their rooms to confront him. “Why can you not just give her a chance, my love? She is really delightful.”
“I do not wish to know her,” Legolas growled. “She is the child of a whore and not my sister.”
Haldir sighed. “Legolas, I have tried to understand your feelings, I have, but they make no sense. Faelivrin is no longer in your father’s life, because of your wishes, even though they loved each other desperately. They sacrificed for you to be happy, and yet you continue to be threatened by an elleth who faded decades ago. Why?”
“She was a whore who took advantage of my father and tried to come between us. You were not there, Haldir.” Legolas was shouting at his lover. “You know nothing of what happened, and I will not have you questioning me about it! She does not belong in Mirkwood. I will not have her coming to my home, and I will not subject the good citizens of Mirkwood to that whore’s child. I do not want a sister! Certainly not one from a whore!”
Haldir stared in disbelief. “I never knew you could be so cruel, Legolas.” Tears came to his eyes. “I cannot stay here. I will ask for a different chamber. I will get my things later.” Legolas opened his mouth, but could say nothing. Haldir moved to the door. “I love you, Legolas, but I do not know who you are now. The Legolas I love could never be so cruel and unreasonable.” Haldir left the room and made his way to find Erestor and get a new room to stay in.
Legolas dropped to the couch and fumed. “The whore came between me and my father and now her spawn comes between me and Haldir.”
Mithrellas stood against the wall outside the door, tears streaked her face. She had hoped to resolve things between Legolas and herself when she came to the door, but had stopped when she heard them arguing. Legolas’ words were like a knife to her heart. She would no longer try to befriend him. Now, she hoped to at least be able to remain civil for her father’s sake. She certainly did not want to cause any embarrassment for the king, Gildor or Imladris. Sadly, she returned to her room.
*****
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