Love Longed For, Love Found 3

Love Longed For, Love Found

Part 3

Posted: January 18, 2008
Title: Love Longed For, Love Found
Author: Tena

*****

"Do I have to tell her?" Gildor frowned, though he already knew the answer. "Yes, yes, I know I do. I just do not know how. I mean what do I say…Mithrellas, my love, your mother lied, your father lives, he is the King of Mirkwood and you have a brother? Oh and by the way, your father hates me. How can I tell her that?" They watched as Gildor got up and started pacing. "What if Thranduil finds out and wants nothing to do with her? What if he knew her mother was pregnant and made her leave? That would break her heart again. What if he wants a daughter and tries to force Mithrellas to come to Mirkwood?" Gildor was now gesturing wildly with his arms as he spoke.

He stopped and sat down hard in his chair. "What if Mithrellas decides she wants to be with her family? Thranduil will have nothing to do with me. He will never allow me to come to Mirkwood." Gildor was feeling so powerless.

Erestor placed a calming hand on his friend’s arm. "Gildor, you can ask ‘what if’ until the end of time. The fact is that she deserves to know that she has family, and that Thranduil is her father. We do not know the reason for her mother leaving and lying about her father being dead. I understand that this can complicate things for you, but Mithrellas loves you, that much is obvious. I cannot think of anything that would change her love and trust in you, unless you hide things from her. Give her the information you know, it is the only fair thing to do."

Gildor continued to look at his lap. "I know you are right, meldir. I am just afraid. In my long life I have never feared as I do now. I could not go on if I can not be with her."

"Gildor, you have time, but I would not advise waiting very long. Imladris hosts the Fall Festival in four years. Thranduil and Legolas will be here. There will be no hiding it once they are here." Glorfindel said, as he stood and squeezed Gildor’s shoulder. Erestor stood, took his husband’s arm and they left the hall.

Elrond and Gildor sat quietly for a while longer when Gildor finally looked up. "What do I do, my friend?"

"Give her some time to adjust to Imladris. Make sure she will be happy here, although I am sure she will. Then tell her the truth. We will all be here to help you both. I am sure she will have many questions, some which we may be able to answer and some we cannot. If it is the worst case scenario and Thranduil knew of her, then she will probably want nothing to do with him," he stood to leave. "But, Gildor, make sure you are the one she hears this from. Many here will see the resemblance, and I do not think she will be happy if she finds out you knew all along and said nothing," Elrond left Gildor to his thoughts.

Gildor went to his chambers and slipped quietly under the sheets, enveloping Mithrellas in his arms. He would deal with his information soon, but tonight he would sleep with her held tightly to him. Mithrellas sighed deeply, leaning back into his embrace. Peace, at least for the time being.

A few days later, Gildor was heading to the training grounds to help Glorfindel, he kissed Mithrellas goodbye. "Good luck with Erestor," he grinned.

She shook her head. "Why does everyone seem so intimidated by Erestor? He is a kind and friendly soul."

"Just wait until you are his student," he snickered. "Ask the twins if you do not believe me." Gildor waved as she walked away.

Mithrellas was about to knock on Erestor’s office door when her nerves hit her. Should she be nervous around Erestor? He seemed like a wonderful ellon. She huffed and chided herself. She knocked lightly and opened the door when Erestor bid her to enter.

"Mithrellas! What a lovely surprise," Erestor stood and took her arm, leading her to a chair. "What can I do for you? Tea? I was just about to have a cup," he said as he moved to the pitcher on the table.

"Tea would be lovely, thank you." She took the cup he offered and smiled. She knew she had no reason to be nervous. "I had a question for you…actually; I have a favor to ask of you."

"Well, just ask. I will do whatever I can for you," he patted her hand.

"It is a rather big task, my lord," she bit her lower lip.

"First, I love big tasks, and second, please call me Erestor. We really do not stand on formality in the valley. It only stands if we are in official negotiations or ceremonies." She blushed and nodded. "Now, what is this big task?"

"Gildor told me that you taught the twins when they were young." Erestor smiled at the memories of his unruly students. "I was wondering if you would consider taking me on as a student. I have never had any formal teaching, but my mother and grandparents did teach me to read and write, of course it was in the common tongue. Gildor has taught me what elvish language and history I know, but I know very little and wish to know more…actually I want to know everything."

Erestor beamed, "I would love to teach you, Mithrellas!"

"You would? Oh Erestor, I promise to be a good student. I know I am very, very far behind, but I will listen and study and do anything you ask of me," she smiled brightly.

"It would be my honor. It has been a very long time since anyone needed my teaching. I will need several days to get lessons prepared, but I still have all the supplies. I need to make a schedule and okay things with Elrond, so let us plan to start in one week. How does that sound?"

"That sounds wonderful! Thank you so much, Erestor." She hugged him tightly and headed out to the training grounds to tell Gildor.

"Erestor will be beside himself with excitement to teach again, Gildor. You know that is his passion. He loves sharing his knowledge and seeing someone learn something new and be successful," he squeezed his friends shoulder. "Have you thought more about when you will talk to Mithrellas?"

"It seems to be the only thing I can think about. I will do it soon, before she starts her lessons. That way when she does learn about Greenwood, she can relate more to it." He looked to the sky, asking the Valar to give him strength.

Mithrellas opened the box Gildor had placed in her lap after dinner. It was a beautiful wooded quill and inkpot of deep mahogany. "Oh, my love, it is beautiful!" she placed them on the table and moved to Gildor’s lap. She kissed him deeply, "Thank you so much. I am so excited to start my lessons with Erestor."

"I know you are and I cannot wait to hear about all that you learn," he took a deep breath. "Meleth, I must talk to you."

"I know."

"You know?"

"I know something has been bothering you. I have been waiting for you to tell me," she hugged him and kissed his neck. "Tell me, my love. Whatever it is we will face it together."

Gildor smiled, this was so like her. She was so strong, but would she be strong enough to handle what he needed to tell her? "Do you remember when we were travelling here and I had pain in my shoulder after we were bathing?"

She grinned, "Yes, and I knew you did not really have pain in your shoulder."

"How did you…why did you not tell me?"

"I trust you, Gildor. I knew whatever it was you would tell me eventually, and that you needed to deal with it yourself first."

He kissed her cheek. "What happened at that time was…wait; I need to go back further. I felt as though I had seen you before, when we first met. Your face was familiar, but of course I knew we had never met. I just did not give it much more thought. Then, at the stream when I looked up at you, I suddenly knew why you looked so familiar," he watched her, confusion in her eyes.

"Gildor, go on…"

"You look very much like someone I know, someone most of us here in Imladris know." She narrowed her eyes, waiting for him to continue. Gildor took her hands. "Mithrellas, I believe I know your father."

"How? How can you know my father? You did not know my mother, and I do not even know where she was from," she slipped off his lap, but still held his hand.

"Mirkwood…I believe your mother is from Mirkwood."

"Why?"

"Because I know an ellon there and you resemble him greatly. Glorfindel, Elrond and Erestor all saw the similarities. It is uncanny really. You have his eyes, and you facial structure is identical," he stroked her cheek.

Mithrellas shivered. "Gildor, you speak of him as if he lives. My father is dead."

"I do not know the reason, and I am sure your mother had a valid reason, but I think she was not completely truthful when she said your father was dead. He lives Mithrellas, and…" he hesitated when she trembled. "You have a brother."

Tears filled her eyes and she looked at Gildor, waiting for him to say this was some kind of prank, but his eyes were filled with compassion and worry. "How can you be sure?"

"I cannot be totally for sure until we speak to him, but Mithrellas, it is quite obvious that you are related."

"Related, but maybe his brother is my father," she was grasping for anything to make sense. Why would her mother lie? She had an image of her mother in her head and she was very protective of that.

"He does not have a brother, my love."

Mithrellas stood and paced. "So, you are saying that my mother lied and that my father lives, and…that I also have a brother and they live in Mirkwood?"

"I know this a lot to take in, but yes that is what I believe."

She stared out of the window for a long time, and then turned back to him. "There is something else you have not told me. What is it?"

"His name." She waited for Gildor to answer, but he would not look at her.

"Gildor?"

"Thranduil…his name is Thranduil. King Thranduil," he met her eyes and then looked down.

Mithrellas stared at him incredulously. "Gildor, do you hear what you are saying. You said my father was King Thranduil…King of Mirkwood," he nodded slowly. Then my brother is Prince…?"

"Legolas," he whispered.

She began to laugh, a nervous laugh. "My love, I know that you believe what you are telling me because I have never known you to lie and I trust you, but really. If my mother were pregnant with the King of Mirkwood’s child, why would she leave?"

Gildor shrugged and shook his head. "I do not know,"

Mithrellas could tell this had taken its toll on Gildor and as confused as she was, she wanted to comfort him. She did trust Gildor and knew he was not lying, and he truly believed what he was telling her.

"All right, let’s think about this rationally," she sat on the sofa facing him and took his hands, squeezing them reassuringly. "Do you know my mother?"

"No"

"Does anyone else here know her?"

"No."

"All right, then maybe she was truthful about not knowing she was pregnant until after she left. But, why would she leave if she was in love?" Gildor watched the emotions playing on her face as she tried to process everything, trying to make sense of it all. "Maybe he did not return her love. What if he toyed with her, used her.? Wait! If there is a King and a Prince then there is a Queen. Was Thranduil unfaithful?"

Gildor shook his head. "There was a queen, but she died before Legolas reached his majority. It was an arranged marriage and they were good friends but not in love."

"Oh…" she suddenly felt for this possible brother. He had lost his mother when he was young too. Tears filled her eyes again. "Gildor, what if he knew she was pregnant and refused her, sent her away. I am sure a child out of wedlock would not be thought highly of in a royal family."

Gildor pulled her to his chest. "I wish I had the answers you seek, my love. It is something I have been thinking of for several days now. I felt guilty not telling you as soon as I noticed the resemblance, but I was afraid."

"Afraid? Of what, my love," she pulled back to look at him.

"Losing you,"

"Why would you lose me?"

"Remember when we talked about my past, and I told you there were those who did not like me because of my past?" She nodded. "Well, Thranduil is one of those. He hates me. To him I will always be a kin slayer and not worthy of anyone. Especially his daughter."

Mithrellas stood with her hands on her hips, suddenly angry and feeling very protective of Gildor. "Now you listen here, Gildor. I will not have anyone and I mean anyone, including my fa…the ellon who may be my father, say one word against you. I told you before I have no time for fools," Gildor sat forward and pulled her back into his lap. He tried not to chuckle at her vehemence. "I do not have any good feelings for this "Thranduil". He may have betrayed my mother’s love for him. He may have known she was with life and sent her to her death. If he is my father and he wants to know me, he will have to accept you or he will not have any sort of relationship with me at all."

Gildor kissed her, his heart swelling, but he could not contain the bubbling laughter that emerged. Mithrellas pulled back to see what was so amusing. "I am sorry, meleth. It is just that I have not seen you angry before. I hope I never do anything to cause you to be angry with me. You can be rather intimidating. Look out Erestor."

Mithrellas laughed with him. "I will never get angry with you, my love…not as long as you never argue with me and always see things my way."

Gildor nodded. "Whatever you say, Mithrellas," they laughed and hugged tightly. The room grew quiet. Mithrellas sighed. "Does Thranduil come to Imladris often?"

"No, he rarely leaves Greenwood, but every five years a Fall Festival is held. Lothlorien hosted it last time and Imladris will host the next festival. Thranduil and Legolas will attend," he watched the grimace grow on her face.

She leaned against his chest, burrowing her head under his chin. She fingers drew slow circles on his side. "How long do I have?"

"The festival will be held in four years," he gripped her tighter.

She lay quietly against him and sighed deeply. "Gildor…" she purred as her hand made its way toward past his hip, sliding closer to his rapidly hardening shaft.

"Yes, my love," he held his breath.

She ran one finger over the bulge in his leggings. "Take me to bed."

Gildor quickly scooped her up. "Yes, love." He kissed her softly.

*****

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