Two Boys And A Bridal Shower

Two Boys And A Bridal Shower

Posted: October 2004
Title: Two Boys and a Bridal Shower
Author: Lostiawen
Type: RPS
Characters: Orlando/ Viggo
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, none of this really happened. The author is not associated with or is implying anything about the sexual preferences or the lives of the people depicted within.
Warnings: sap, fluff.
Author's Notes: This cute little bunny hopped into my lap while Salix and I were bitching about the silly games in bridal showers. I couldn't help but write it up. Many thanks to Elizabeth for her help with the title, and for her ideas. * mwah* babe!

Summary: Viggo and Orlando are being stubborn. What's a girl to do?

*****

"Over here!" Miranda called out as Liv entered the restaurant. She smiled when her co-star approached, but then she noticed the indignant glint in her eyes.

"Uh oh, I know that look...let me guess, our favorite boys are at it again?"

Liv rolled her eyes. " Vig and Orli are so lame. They keep mooning over each other, but neither of them has said a single thing. Boys!" She flopped down into her seat. "And every time I try to push them together, they wind up wrestling, drinking, or doing something 'manly'. Argh!"

Miranda leaned closer. "Is that why they've been pulling pranks on you lately?"

Liv grimaced. "Where do you think the tampon tree came from? I told Vig and Orli that I'd join them for dinner, and then I bailed before they arrived, just so they'd be stuck talking to each other. Nothing happened, and then they stole my Kotexes the next day. God, I was so pissed off."

"Did you let them have it?"

"Oh yeah. And then the next time I tried to set them up, they put my foundation in the refrigerator."

Miranda tapped her lip with her finger. "You know, Liv, you're so sweet that you getting narked is like watching a cute little puppy growl. You have to convince them you're serious."

Liv pouted. "I know...but Orli's so adorable that I have a hard time staying mad at him. Some actress I am."

"Don't worry about it, luv. Let's just enjoy our dinner."

***

Two weeks later, the conversation was almost entirely forgotten about as the day to day drudgery of filming wiped it from Liv and Miranda's minds. After one of their more intense days, they decided to go out to dinner, and dragged Viggo and Orli along.

"So, what's new in your neck of the woods, Orli?" Viggo asked once their orders had been placed.

"Got a letter from Sam. She's been invited to a bridal shower," Orli said. "She was really excited and everything. Shit, what's the big deal, man? It's just a bloody boring party with lots of giggling."

Viggo replied, "Search me. I think it's an outdated, oppressive tradition. Thank God Exene decided against having one."

A flash of inspiration hit Miranda. Deciding to go for broke, she fumed, "That's enough! I've had it up to *here* with your sexism!"

Several jaws dropped open. "What?" Orli stammered.

Miranda noticed that Liv was about to say something and she subtly nudged her. Liv looked puzzled at first, but then she gave Miranda a knowing look.

Encouraged, Miranda continued on her tirade. "First you set up that fucking tampon tree, then there's the porno nights and the constant fart jokes. Didn't you even think that I'd be bloody offended?" Her voice was growing louder, and people were starting to stare at them.

"Shit...I'm so sorry," Orli said, hunching down in his seat.

"Miranda..." Viggo added, looking embarrassed. "I had no idea. Fuck, how can we make this up to you?"

Miranda beamed. "Throw me a bridal shower."

"What?" Orli squeaked.

"Throw me a bridal shower," Miranda stated again. " Viggo can do all of the cooking and taking photographs. And *you*," she said, poking Orli in the chest, "get to be the host. I'll give you a list of who I want to invite."

"That's completely mad."

"Why do you always criticize things that you've never experienced?" she shot back.

Viggo sighed. "She has a point, Orli."

Orli stammered, "But I don't know what to do!"

Miranda patted his hand. "Don't worry about it, I'll help you. Just trust me."

***

Orli straightened one of the decorations and bounced around nervously. Miranda had provided him with a guest list and detailed instructions, but he was still afraid of bitching things up.

" Vig! How are the hors d'oevres coming along?"

" Orli, you asked me that five minutes ago. Will you stop worrying?"

"But Vig..." Orli whinged, "what if no one shows up? What if there isn't enough food? What if everyone decides that I'm a tosser and leaves..."

"Quiet, elf boy, you'll be fine."

"But..."

"Shut up and mix the punch."

" Wanker," Orli pouted. He almost shot through the roof when the doorbell rang.

Viggo rolled his eyes. "Answer that, please."

Grousing, Orli trotted to the door and pulled it open. He beamed when he saw that Liv was the first one to arrive. She smiled, and then flung herself into his arms and hugged him.

"This is just so cool!" she squealed. "I decided to drop by early to see how everything was coming along."

"Thanks, princess," Orli said.

"Oh my God, I *love* these decorations!" Liv said.

Viggo put the last plate on the table and said, " Liv, could I have your car keys?"

Liv looked confused. "Um, what?"

"You're going to be drinking, so I'll need your keys."

At this point, Liv had spotted the table with wine and champagne. Her eyes almost bugged out of her head -- they had provided about a bottle of each per guest. "Shit! That's *way* too much alcohol! What were you thinking?"

Orli mumbled, "Well, uh...Miranda said to buy drinks, and we, like, stocked up for a typical party."

Liv replied, " Orli... Vig, there's not much drinking at bridal showers. Maybe a glass of wine or something, but that's it." She eyed the punch suspiciously. "You guys didn't spike that, did you?"

"Fuck no," Orli said, sounding hurt. "Miranda said wine and champagne only, and I stuck to that. What kind of a lush do you think I am?"

"A big one," Liv said. She patted Orli's cheek, noticing his indignant look. " Awww, don't pout, sweetie; everyone knows that you and Vig can drink the Hobbits under the table."

Orli stuck his tongue out at her, and Liv giggled. Still annoyed, he tossed an hors d'oevre at her.

Liv caught it and popped it into her mouth. " Mmmm, oh God, that's good!"

Viggo grinned. "Coming from you, that's a big compliment. Your Dad is quite the gourmet chef."

"He just likes to cook," Liv said, blushing. "Anyway, I brought the stuff for the games." She indicated the bag in her hand.

"Games?" Orli said. "What games?"

"Every bridal shower has games, silly."

"Um, wouldn't that interfere with the stripper?"

Liv rolled her eyes. " Orli! We don't *have* strippers! This is not a boy party!"

"Okay, okay..." Orli said. He tried to peek into the bag, but Liv shooed him away. "It's better if you don't know what I have in there ahead of time."

Orli groaned. "Why do I have the feeling that this is going to be bad?"

Liv's answering smirk didn't comfort him at all.

***

Despite Orli's misgivings, the shower was a smash hit. Miranda had invited women from the crew and make-up. Orli didn't quite recognize the women from the crew, but he figured that they were probably working on the second or third units. After all, this was a huge production; there was no way he'd have met every single person attached to it. Either way, all of the guests were having a fantastic time, which made Orli feel warm and happy inside.

"All right," Miranda announced at the high point of the evening, "It's time to play!"

Orli watched a small distance away as all of the guests gathered around Miranda. He leaned over and whispered to Viggo, "Wonder what kind of girly games they do?"

Viggo replied, "Well, it obviously doesn't involve copious amounts of alcohol."

Liv reached into her bag and pulled out a roll of toilet paper. "Time to make the dress!" She looked over at Orli and grinned. "And tradition says that the hostess is the model!"

"What?" Orli squeaked. "Me???"

Miranda's smile was not reassuring. "And...you have to be nude while we're putting it on you."

Viggo looked amused. Orli said, "That's completely daft! You're taking the piss! There's no way that would happen if I wasn't here!"

Liv said, "It totally happens. When it's just girls, we don't mind showing skin -- it's all the same parts. Besides, you're a boy. What do you know about what goes on in bridal showers?"

Viggo added, "It makes sense. And we're all in the acting business. Everyone's used to nudity."

Orli grumbled. "I'm not."

Miranda said, "Orlando, Viggo's right. You're just another body to us." Orlando scanned her face for any signs that she was having him on, but she remained dead serious.

Sighing, he said. "All right. But no giggling while I get my kit off."

"We wouldn't dream of it," Liv said. "Really, Orli, you have nothing to be shy about. We've seen it all."

Orlando still hesitated as he pulled off his shirt. Noticing a lack of reaction, he felt bolder and doffed the rest of his clothes.

"Come over here and stand in the center," Miranda said.

Orlando obeyed, his cheeks flushing pink. He noticed Viggo focusing his camera and growled, "Put that thing away. I am *not* going to have potential blackmail photos taken of me."

Shaking his head in disappointment, Viggo complied with Orli's wish. Miranda ignored both of them, and busied herself with passing out toilet paper to the rest of the guests.

"Let's get to work, ladies," she commanded once the last roll was distributed. "I want to see something really memorable."

The next half hour was torturous for Orli. Standing still for even a minute was no small feat for him, but Liv had told him that any movement would tear the paper, and so he had to remain frozen in place the entire time.

Even worse, Viggo was looking at him with those beautiful, intense blue eyes. Orli shivered, regretting his earlier request. At least he could ignore Viggo if the man was hiding behind a camera. Now, under that unrelenting gaze, Orli felt as if his soul were being stripped bare, leaving him vulnerable and defenseless.

A tremor passed through Orlando as Viggo's eyes raked over his semi-naked body. His naughty bits had been covered up, but the thin paper didn't hide a single damn thing. Orli licked his now dry lips, quivering at the hungry look on Viggo's face.

Tingles shot straight to his crotch, and Orlando gulped in fear. Sod it all, he could not afford to get an erection right now.

No, he thought fiercely at his cock, do *not* stand up to say hi, you bastard! They'll never let you hear the end of it...down, damnit, down. Come on, you can't afford to get involved with Viggo, you'll ruin your friendship...

Orlando lost track of the time while he tried to keep his body under control. He felt overheated, and the lightest touch from anyone left cool prickles on his sensitized skin. Growling, he kept concentrating on not embarrassing himself, and before he knew it,
Liv was attaching a toilet paper rose to a strap on the completed dress.

"All done," she chirped.

Orli looked down and blushed. They had wrapped him in an off-the-shoulder, low-cut gown that hugged his body tightly all the way down to his ankles. One breath and the whole thing would fall to pieces.

Miranda called everyone to attention and brandished a small handful of face-down playing cards. "And now...whoever draws the Ace of Hearts gets to give our lovely host a kiss."

Everyone clapped in excitement, and Orli grinned. Well, at least he'd get something for all of his trouble. He wasn't too keen on kissing Liv, but the other birds were certainly attractive enough...

" Viggo? You first," Miranda said.

Orli sputtered, "But he's not a guest!"

Miranda replied, "He worked hard to make all of this food, Orli. Come on, Viggo, draw."

"Don't worry, elf boy, I'll probably get the queen of spades," Viggo said. He pulled out a card and his jaw dropped open. "I have the Ace."

"Oh fuck..." Orli said, unable to say anything more intelligible because his heart was pounding. He knew that if Viggo kissed him, he'd definitely embarrass himself. He turned his puppy dog eyes on the other man, hoping that his friend would recognize his silent plea.

"Well, go on with it. It's just a little kiss," Miranda said. "Party rules say you have to do it." The other guests chimed in, nudging Viggo forward, insisting that he perform his duty. Resigned to the fact that he had to go through with it, Viggo began walking up to Orli.

Orlando felt like a deer in the headlights as Viggo approached. He couldn't move even a millimeter without tearing the flimsy garment draped over him, and he very much wanted to flee right now. Anything was preferable to Viggo finding out about his true feelings. He shook as Viggo cupped his face, and he dropped his gaze, unable to maintain eye contact.

"Relax," Viggo said in a stage whisper. "I'll give you a little peck and you can go." He closed the distance between them and brushed his mouth over Orli's.

Just that brief contact sent a jolt straight to Orlando's core. He had been prepared for a physical reaction, but whatever was happening now had far surpassed it. He gasped in surprise and looked up, needing to see Viggo's face.

A thrill coursed through him when he saw the shock and wonder in Viggo's gaze. Feeling bold, Orli murmured, "Kiss me again...for real."

His stomach made several flip-flops as Viggo leaned in again. Orlando memorized every tactile detail -- the rasp of stubble, the calloused hands stroking his cheeks with tenderness, their breaths mingling as Viggo drew closer and closer...

Lights exploded behind his eyes as soon as their lips met. Orlando moaned as Viggo's tongue stroked against his, making every nerve sing and come alive. He was drowning in sensation as Viggo claimed his mouth, the rest of the world disappearing as he lost himself in the kiss.

When they parted, Viggo touched his forehead to Orlando's. "Wow," Orli said, awestruck. He then noticed that the room was completely silent. "Hey, everyone left."

"Good," Viggo rasped, the sheer need in his voice sending tremors through Orli's body. "Because I'm not about to stop."

Before Orli could voice a protest, Viggo had latched onto his neck. Another jolt shot through his system, turning his knees to jelly, rendering him boneless in Viggo's grasp.

" Vig...oh God," he moaned, squirming. He tried to reach up to tangle his hands in Viggo's hair, but his arm got caught in a loop of toilet paper.

"Shit, it's coming apart," Orli said, "I'm going to kill myself if I move."

"Fuck this," Viggo growled. He grabbed the neckline and tore the paper off Orli's body, his eyes darkening with lust as the flimsy dress fell away.

Orli whimpered as Viggo pressed him down to the ground, bringing their groins in full contact. He bucked up, rubbing his hard cock against Viggo's jeans, the fluid from his arousal dampening the thick cloth.

"Need you," he whispered, surprised by the huskiness of his voice.

Viggo kissed him again, stealing his breath away. "Not until I've tasted you," he purred.

Before Orli could whinge, Viggo carried him over to the one of the chairs by the buffet table and sat down, settling Orli into his lap. He fumbled around the table top, looking for something.

"Get those clothes off, damnit," Orli said, tugging on Viggo's t-shirt. Once the offending garment had been removed, he ran his hands over Viggo's chest, savoring the feel of the crisp blond hairs underneath his palms.

He yelped when something cold was abruptly squirted on him. "What the fuck?"

"Just adding a little flavoring," Viggo said, adding another dollop of whipped cream onto Orli's nipple.

Orli's answering complaint faded off into a moan as Viggo licked off the topping with long swipes of his tongue. Sparks shot through him when Viggo paused and lapped at his nipple, teasing it into a stiff peak.

He moaned and pressed Viggo's face closer to his skin. "More," he said, his voice breathy. Orli gasped as Viggo applied more cream to him in random patterns, hissing as the coolness was soon followed by a hot tongue nibbling and sucking every bit of his skin.

Orli writhed, unable to take any more of this sweet torture. He was burning up inside, and he ached with desire. He ground his hips frantically against Viggo's crotch. "Please," he moaned, "Fuck me."

Growling, Viggo boosted himself up and removed his jeans. He yanked off his boxers and pulled Orli close, sliding their hard cocks against each other.

Orli groaned, rocking against Viggo, heat suffusing his body at the delicious contact. More liquid welled out of his prick, dribbling over to Viggo's erection and joining them with a thin thread.

" Vig," Orli pleaded again, feeling as if he was going to explode. He sighed in relief when he saw Viggo reaching over to grab a bottle of olive oil.

Unwilling to wait for another round of teasing, Orli grabbed the oil, pouring it over Viggo's cock and his hand. He quickly raised himself up, wasting no time in plunging his oil-slick fingers into his entrance.

"Oh God!" he moaned, as he stroked himself inside. He arched back, his lips parting as he found his sweet spot. He mewled when Viggo stilled his hand, tugging downward on his wrist.

"Hush," Viggo said, forcing Orli to remove his fingers. "I can't wait any longer."

Orli trembled as Viggo tugged him forward, holding him up and nudging against his entrance. He inhaled sharply as Viggo's hips pushed upward, breaching him by the smallest amount.

"Are you all right?" Viggo gasped out, trembling as he held himself back. Orli, however, was sick of waiting; he grabbed Viggo's shoulders, slamming downward with his hips and impaling himself in one stroke.

"Fuck!" he shrieked, writhing in Viggo's lap. He heard Viggo cry out, gasping at the sudden contact. Grinning in triumph, Orli began to pump his hips, obscenities pouring from his mouth as the hard cock within him slid over his prostate.

" Orli...oh God, you feel so good," Viggo moaned. "You're so tight..."

Orli flicked a tongue over Viggo's ear. "Then give it to me," he said. "Fuck me hard."

He screamed as Viggo bucked upward, pounding into him with relentless thrusts. His throbbing cock rubbed against Viggo's stomach, dripping steadily as he raced towards his release. He arched backward and cried out when he felt Viggo's hand wrapping around his straining erection.

"Come for me, baby," Viggo drawled, his voice dripping with pure sin. "Come for me, and then I'll lick your hot spunk off my hand."

"Christ...VIGGO!" Orli wailed, quivering as he spurted over Viggo's pumping fist. He clamped down hard as his orgasm rocked his body, and he was almost lifted off the chair as Viggo slammed into him one final time, climaxing with a loud roar.

Gasping, the two of them collapsed back into the chair. Viggo slowly raised his wet hand to his lips, his long tongue snaking out to lap up every bit of Orli's release. When Viggo finished, Orli kissed him hard, scouring his mouth for the last of their mingled tastes.

"Oh man, that was fantastic," Orli said as they parted.

"That was probably the best bridal shower I've ever been to," Viggo said with a wicked grin.

"That was the *only* bridal shower you've ever been to, filthy human."

"Oh. Right."

Orli laughed and kissed him again. "I wonder where the lot of them disappeared off to?" A look of horror crossed his face. "Fuck! What if they come back right now? We interrupted the party..."

Viggo silenced him with a kiss, "It's your prerogative as host to end the party early if you need to."

Orli grinned. "Cool! Lock the door, Vig. This party is now cancelled on account of me needing several good, hard shags."

"Several? Aren't you being a little ambitious?" Viggo asked. He moaned as Orli pressed a renewed erection against his stomach.

" Mmm, what was that?" Orli purred.

Viggo gasped, "I said, 'I think we're not leaving until I fuck you through the mattress.'"

***

Miranda smiled as the dessert was taken away. When the kissing had started, she and the rest of the party goers had discreetly left, agreeing to rendezvous at the Green Parrot.

She said, "I wonder if they're having it off by now."

Liv giggled and said, "Miranda! You're horrible! How could you say that?"

Monique, one of the guests, replied, "Well, I'm *glad* you set them up. I got so tired of them flirting with each other and not doing anything about it."

Liv bounced in her chair and said, "Oh my God, Miranda, I forgot to tell you about how incredible this all was. First, you acting pissed at Orli's comments, and then getting them to agree to the shower in the first place. And altering the games! I can't tell you how hard it was to keep a straight face when you told Orli he had to strip!"

Monique added, "I'm glad Miranda told all of us about that beforehand. Gave me some time to get the giggles out of my system."

Jane, from make-up, added, "Well, she did pick people who had the best poker faces, or just plain weren't interested in either of them."

Monique chuckled. "I was having my own private laugh, too. Viggo and Orli didn't recognize me at all."

Miranda said, "That's because you weren't wearing your beard."

Liv tittered. "This was just so overall cool! I can't wait to see their faces on Monday!"

Jane replied, "They probably won't be able to sit down, knowing those two."

Laughter bubbled out from everyone at the table, followed by the clinking of wine glasses as they wound up a successful evening.

***

The LoTR Reunion, New Zealand, Dec. 2009

Miranda could hardly believe that it had been ten years since filming had begun. She felt warm inside as she mingled, reuniting with old friends from the cast and crew.

She was talking to Liv when a pair of arms embraced her in a bear hug. "Miranda!" Orli said with enthusiasm. "It's been ages when I saw you last!"

Miranda laughed and spun around, hugging Orli as hard as she could manage. " Orli! How are you?" She held him at arm's length. Even though ten years had passed, he was still beautiful beyond words, but a special quality in his smile just lit up the entire room. "My God, you're positively glowing!"

Orli burbled, "That's because Viggo proposed to me on the ride over."

"WHAT?" Liv shrieked. "That's wonderful!"

"He did?" Miranda said. "Oh, Orli...congratulations!"

Orli laughed and hugged the two of them. "Thanks! Fuck, I can't tell you how chuffed I am right now." He beamed at Miranda. "And I want *you* to throw me a bachelor party."

"What?" Miranda said in shock.

"I threw you a bridal shower, so it's only fair."

"B-b-but...um," Miranda replied.

Orlando grinned and then kissed her on the tip of her nose. "Gotcha. I'm just kidding, luv. Viggo and I kind of suspected afterward, so I asked Sam about what goes on during a proper shower." He chuckled. "That bit about me getting naked was sheer genius."

Miranda blushed. "You two were being so thick that I thought you needed some encouragement."

"Well, to tell you the truth, if Vig hadn't lucked out on the kissing game, we would have been back to where we started."

"Oh, Orli! I rigged that part," Miranda laughed. "*All* of those cards were Aces."

Orlando 's jaw dropped open. "They...shit...really?"

Miranda nodded. Orli stared for several seconds and then swept her up in a large hug again. "You're fucking brilliant!" He laughed and whirled her around. "But really...I'd be honored if you threw some sort of party for me. After all, you were the one who got us together."

" Wellll..." Miranda said, "I *could* throw you a bachelor party...but I want to have the freedom to alter it."

"Do whatever you want, luv, as long as it doesn't involve me going starkers, I'm fine with it."

Miranda's eyes danced wickedly, "I wouldn't do that to you. Besides, I think it's Viggo's turn now."

*****

THE END

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