Never Let Go

Never Let Go

Posted: January 4, 2008
Title: Never Let Go
Sequel to: One Last Time
Author: Laur Melyanna
Type: FCS
Characters: Haldir/Lindir
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Not mine.
Beta: TUX!!! Tux my sweetie, I love you so much! Thank you for doing this^^.
Author’s Note: I dedicate this to Jess, lol, since you wanted it so much, here it is! Hope you like it!

Summary: Haldir finally gets his soul mate back.

*****

It had been so long, but the millennia of impatient waiting had not erased the memory of his Songbird. Never would Haldir’s skin forget the touch of his lover, nor his heart the warmth of his love and the beauty of his songs. Lindir was precious, but he had been gone for so long, for too long.

Death had stolen the minstrel from the hands of a loving Master and a possessive lover. It was the most painful, undignified blow he could have received, for it had been his fault. Years had passed, the cycle of sun, moon and seasons repeating themselves before his eyes and, with each completed cycle, Haldir seemed more listless. His body was numb and his eyes blank, even as he fought battles where he could pretend to shed his rage for the injustice done to his Songbird; even as he smiled merrily while singing along to songs of victory, nothing ever brought life back to his heart.

Now he stood in the shores of the Undying Lands, the one thing he wished to hold forever already gone. He had arrived in Valinor over a thousand years ago; the day he set foot in that haven of lost souls had been the closest he had felt to happiness in millennia, expecting to see Lindir there, waiting for him. But Námo seemed to hold the minstrel in death as possessively as the Marchwarden had held him in life; Lindir never came. Several Elves had been released from Mandos’s halls, but it had never been his lover.

He was rotten inside, the one soul Valinor could not heal, for it was not mending that it needed, it needed its other half to be whole again and no amount of time would ever change that. He no longer found joy in anything simple or rare; Haldir did not even try to pretend, as much as his family worried. Nothing seemed to get past the walls he had built around himself.

The hurting Elf spent his days down by the shores, trying to spot some new ship arriving, but Círdan, to whom he had grown somewhat close – thanks to the soothing and simple words the Elf had to offer – told him no more ships would come. Every day he asked how the deceased souls were brought to Aman, but all that the shipwright would tell him was, “Keep admiring the seas, sometimes they wash to shore wonderful gifts.” Haldir then spent every day, every waking hour of his life looking out onto the vast expanse of water, trying to see a pale body floating, swimming, singing…but he never saw anything.

As the sun set that day, the image of beauty that played before the Marchwarden’s gray eyes was of little interest. Not even the way the last rays of sun played in golden and pink shades across fluffy clouds could catch his attention. Suddenly his brow creased, the sea becoming of little importance as they took in the long line of sand the waves washed over. He could see mounds of sand where before only a smooth shore had stood.

The Elf kept watching from afar, his eyes widening as another wave splashed over the uneven sand, and once it retreated into the sea what lay there was not sand, but bodies; dozens of sickly pale bodies that nearly merged with the light sand.

He could not tell how things changed, but at first all the bodies seemed to be the same, and then in the blink of an eye they were all individual; large, small, long and short, with an array of hair colors. Haldir could simply not understand nor see when the transformations came about.

The silver haired Elf took a step closer, hesitant, his heart thundering, making him dizzy with foolish hope. It could not be, but perhaps, just perhaps, it was. Elves returned from the cold halls of death; but what of his Songbird, who was to say he was even among them?

Something drew him closer though, Haldir could not resist. He kept walking until he stood just a few feet away from the bodies, no longer able to take another step and intrude the space of those creatures. His eyes traveled along the shore, looking over the magic happening before his eyes, but it was not one of those bodies that caught his attention. In the end, it was not the sight of his beautiful Lindir that made him take the last step, but a thin, old and worn strip of leather.

Swallowing hard, Haldir crouched down, trying not to disturb the writhing bodies before him. He looked down at the wet collar, his heart thumping so hard it hurt. His hand trembled, and for the second time in his entire life, he quivered in fear and anticipation. Yet as he reached for it, closing his fingers around the adornment, someone stopped him from taking it. Haldir froze at the cold, wet touch of a trembling hand, one of the bodies in the sand seeming to find life and reach for the collar with feeble strength but strong determination. The warrior wanted to pull back and take the collar with him, but the slender fingers closed around his hand with painful desperation, and in a flash of white strands of hair tumbling over narrow shoulders, the Elf lifted his head to stare at the one who dared steal his treasure, and it was then that Haldir lost his ground.

It was Lindir.

Piercing green eyes pinned him to his spot, wide with fear and blank of knowledge, until slowly they seemed to regain awareness and pain overwhelmed the small, trembling figure, a choked cry leaving his lips as the figure before him began to make sense.

Haldir fell to his knees before the young body, tears streaming down his cheeks freely, a raw cry of relief and joy leaving his lips, sounding through his very soul. It would take time for that new body to return to its former glory, to gain full intelligence and reign over its senses, Haldir knew, and it did not matter; Lindir knew it was him, and finally, finally the Valar returned to him what was his.

Threading his fingers with his Songbird’s, they both held the collar tightly between their hands, Haldir bringing the fragile body into his arms and holding him possessively, for this time, he would truly never let go.

*****

THE END

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