Part 16

Posted: January 2004
Author: Larien Elengasse

*~*

Third Age, June 23, 2980, Lórien

As Aragorn was closeted with the Lady Galadriel in her study, engaged in a conversation that would change his fate as well as the fates of others, Elrohir paced his talan, anxious for his brother's return. When he sat with his grandmother earlier that day he had come to a conclusion that both excited him and frightened him to death. He dropped upon the bed and flopped to his back, closing his eyes and remembering times past.

For most, their youth was spent in blissful innocence. Even for Elrohir and Elladan that had been true, until their time came. He could hear the crackling of the fire, feel the soft woven cotton beneath his bare legs, the silk of his nightshirt against his skin, just like it was yesterday.

**He sat on the floor of the bedroom he shared with Elladan, donned in his nightshirt, basking in the warmth of the fire that lit their room. Elladan sat across from him, also wearing his nightshirt, staring intently at the game board in between them.

"Come on…" he chided, "You cannot take all night to make a decision."

"Ssshh!" his elder twin admonished, holding one finger up to his pursed lips. "You cannot rush me, Elrohir."

"What difference does it make?" he asked sarcastically, "I bet I will lose anyway."

He watched Elladan's full lips curve into a smile as his twin's eyes flickered for a brief instant. "You do not give yourself enough credit, Elrohir," Elladan answered softly. "You have me backed into a corner here."

"Do not be foolish! I have never beat you at this game, and bet I never will," he answered somewhat gloomily.

"Bet? You want to bet?" his elder twin asked. "Fine, if I win, I get to pose a challenge to you, and if you win, you get to do the same to me."

He groaned then acquiesced. "Fine, I accept. Now, hurry up so I may meet my doom."

After a few minutes more of consideration, Elladan lifted the playing piece and made his move, sealing his fate and winning the game. Elladan looked up at him with bright eyes. "It was close, gwanur, very close. But it appears you have fallen to the master once again."

"See!" Elrohir grumbled, "I knew this would happen… Alright, so what is it? What is the challenge you pose?"

"I dare you to do one of two things," Elladan began softly. "Either do something that scares you more than anything else, or…"

His brows rose in fearful anticipation. "Or?"

"Or, sneak down the hall and surprise Erestor while he is in the bath."

He blanched at the challenge put before him, Erestor was not one to be trifled with, this was a lesson he had learned well early on. After careful consideration he answered, "What if those are one in the same?"

Elladan chuckled, "Then it appears Erestor will be getting a surprise visit from his most favorite pupil."

He shook his head vigorously, the thought of Erestor in nothing but that which he was born was too humiliating to imagine for his young mind. "Never mind, I choose the former," he said with resignation in his voice.

Elladan furrowed his brow and leveled his gaze on his twin. "I am trusting you to be truthful, Elrohir. If you are false, I will know it, I will see it in your eyes."

He nodded slowly. "I know. Now close your eyes."

Elladan raised an eyebrow. "Pardon me?"

He took a deep breath and let out an exasperated sigh. "Close your eyes."

Elladan closed his eyes and waited.

At first, it was just the gentle press of lips upon lips, something that they had done since they were elflings. But then, Elrohir coaxed his twin's mouth open and slowly, tentatively slid his tongue inside.

He whimpered into the kiss, sensations of shock, fear, and something unknown flooding his body. Elladan drew back, his eyes still closed, his lips still parted, and he looked at his twin in awe. He was truly beautiful and he found that he wanted to do it again. Elladan's trembling fingers reached into his hair, cupping his ear and drawing him back to lips that were softer than he could imagine. He did not resist, but leaned forward. This time Elladan needed no coaxing, this time his twin opened his mouth and caressed his tongue as it entered his mouth. He moaned quietly, a bright, throbbing sensation building in his loins, and Elladan plunged deeper, opening his mouth wider as his other hand slid around his back. Their bodies were pressed against one another, and he could feel the heat building in his twin's body, and he also felt something else. He felt Elladan's reaction to their kiss, and it mirrored his own.

Elladan finally drew away, his perfectly sensual lips whispering, "Elrohir…"

His heart was in his throat, a thin sheen of sweat covered his body, he trembled uncontrollably. He feared what he had done had irreparably damaged his relationship with his twin, with the one he loved more than anyone in the world. But when Elladan's eyes opened, he saw the truth in them.**

Elrohir's eyes opened and he stared up through the arbor that served as a roof to his talan. The sun was setting in the west and the sky was a deepening blue, signaling the onset of night. He heard his twin's footsteps upon the ladder approaching his talan and he closed his eyes, swallowing hard the lump that had grown in his throat. "This is it…" he whispered to himself. "This is the moment of truth, when I take the step that cannot be reversed."

Elladan entered his brother's talan with a sad look upon his face. He closed the door behind him and he saw the recognition in Elrohir's eyes; his twin knew what he would say even before he said it. "I am sorry, Elrohir…" he began softly. "I tried to talk to him, I tried to tell him…"

Elrohir rose from the bed and crossed the room, and pressed his fingers to his brother's lips. "Ssshhh… Elladan," he whispered. "It is all right. I knew this would be the result. Perhaps it is for the best. Haldir deserves someone wholly devoted to him, he is a good elf."

Elladan smiled sadly. "Are you all right, Elrohir?" he asked quietly.

Elrohir nodded and answered, "Better than I have been for a long time, actually." He backed away from his twin and turned to look out the window. He clasped his hands behind his back and clutched them tight as they began to tremble. "I had a long talk with Grandmother today," he began slowly.

Elladan approached him and placed his hand on his twin's shoulder. "About what?"

Elrohir took a deep breath, trying to quell his nerves. "About Haldir and I, and other things."

Elladan looked at the back of his twin's head and fought the urge to pull him into his arms and hold him close. "What other things, Elrohir?" he asked quietly.

Elrohir could not seem to find the words he needed to say, he could think of no way to broach this subject with his twin. So instead of words he turned around to face him, and let his eyes communicate all that was in his heart.

Elladan looked deep into his eyes and saw what was in his twin's heart and mind, and he reached out with a trembling hand and caressed his face. "Oh, Elrohir…" he whispered. "Are you sure? Are you sure this is what you want?" he asked. Elrohir nodded, unable to speak. "You know what this means, you know…"

This time, instead of his fingers, Elrohir covered his twin's mouth with his own and wrapped his arms around his waist.

A small moan escaped Elladan. So long, this had haunted his thoughts, and after he parted with Aragorn, this was almost all that occupied them. He ran his hands into his twin's hair, gently kissing him, softly caressing his tongue with his own.

Elrohir whimpered into the kiss; it was a sound born of undeniable love and reckless want. He clutched at Elladan's back and pulled him tighter. Over two thousand years of denying his heart's desire, two thousand years of tortured dreams and renounced passion; it all poured forth with that kiss. He consumed Elladan; he was starved for him. That first kiss so very long ago on the floor of their bedroom had planted the seed for this need and want he felt now. He began guiding Elladan backward toward the bed, he wanted him, he wanted to feel his twin's body pressed against his own, to feel his hands on him, his mouth on him.

In the back of Elladan's mind, he heard the sound of footsteps upon the ladder of Elrohir's talan, and he put his hands on his twin's shoulders and pried him away. "Elrohir…" he gasped, "Stop, someone is coming…"

Elrohir staggered backward, struggling to regain himself. He had been awash in Elladan's taste, in his scent, and now the lack of it nearly drove him mad. He looked at his beautiful twin, who was hastily straightening his tunic and his braids, and it was all he could do not to throw himself at him again.

"Elrohir!" Elladan whispered harshly. "Someone is coming!" He moved to Elrohir's side and straightened his twin's hair and his tunic, and looked with dismay into his nearly black eyes. "Oh no…" he whispered, and quickly looked into the mirror. His own eyes were the same, his pupils dilated with passion. He heard footsteps again and watched Elrohir cross the room, throwing the latch on the door and turning toward him, placing his finger over his lips.

A soft knock on the door was followed by a hushed deep voice. "Elrohir? Are you there?" It was Arwen.

Elrohir was now on the bed, unbuttoning his tunic as his dark eyes focused on his twin. "Go away, I do not want to talk now," he called.

"Are you all right, gwanur?" she asked.

"I am fine, Arwen. I just need to be alone for awhile," he answered, his tunic falling to the floor. He beckoned his twin by crooking his finger, but Elladan was rooted to the spot, unable to move, he could see the desire and fear at war within his brother.

"Alright, Elrohir," she answered. "I will check on you later." Moments later they heard footsteps again, fading into the distance as Arwen left them to their fate.

Elladan stared at his brother, at a body so like his own, at a face that was the mirror image of his. Yet, for all their similarities, there were differences. He was always the careful one, the thoughtful one, the planner; Elrohir was always reckless, plunging in, heedless to danger. His twin reclined before him, his long denied desire prominent between his legs, legs that Elladan now could not stop staring at. Fear raged inside him, he knew what it meant if they did this. They would be forever denied entrance into the west, they would forever have to hide their love from all around them. Did he love Elrohir enough? Could he bear this burden? Was his heart and his soul strong enough to do this?

The sound of Elrohir's voice made the decision for him. It softly called, "Amin mela lle, Elladan." A tear fell down his cheek and he knew this was right, that it was what he had always wanted. His fingers worked the toggles on his tunic and it fell discarded to the floor as he crossed the room to his twin's bed.

Elrohir smiled and reached out for Elladan as he crawled onto the bed. His elder brother paused and looked at him, and his hand reached out and touched his bare chest. His eyes closed briefly as he sighed and arched into his twin's touch, lost so soon to the one he craved all his life.

Elladan lowered his head, pressing his lips to Elrohir's chest, tasting him for the first time in almost longer than he could remember. He moved to a pebbled nipple and stroked it with his tongue; the shuddering gasp and moan that escaped his brother caused his heart to stop. He brought his full weight down between Elrohir's legs and felt his twin's arousal press into his stomach. He continued working Elrohir's nipples until he whimpered and arched, and begged him to stop. He turned his gaze up to Elrohir's and began working his way lower, his eyes never leaving his twin's.

Elrohir looked down at him, so beautiful in his passion, and reveled in the wicked things Elladan's mouth did to him. "By Elbereth…" he whispered as he arched again, his twin's soft, full lips grazing the rise in his leggings. "Saes, gwanur…" he whispered. "Aniron lle, Im baur lle…" He gasped as his leggings slid past his hips and off his legs, his engorged, weeping arousal lying in wait against his stomach.

Elladan straddled his brother's legs and whispered, "Look at me, Elrohir…" When Elrohir's desperate gaze settled upon his own he slowly began undressing himself, his leggings sliding past his hips with painful slowness. He rose from the bed just long enough to kick off his boots and leggings and discard them. He then crawled back upon the bed, settling between Elrohir's legs, watching the slow undulation of his twin's lithe body, listening to his breathless moans and pleading whispers.

"This night is for us, Elrohir," he whispered softly. "No more denying what we know in our hearts to be true, no more settling, no more pretending to ourselves and to others that we are like they are."

"We are not as they are…" Elrohir whispered in reply. "My life and my soul are bound to you, Elladan. I belong to you, completely, come what may."

"Even to your own doom?" Elladan asked gently.

"Even to our doom," Elrohir replied.

"We will always be together, Elrohir, unto the ending of the world," Elladan whispered.

"An ur (for eternity)," he whispered breathlessly. "Caro mil enni (make love to me), gwanur."

Elladan then made love to him for the first time in their lives.

*****

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