Hidden Love 4

Hidden Love

Part 4

Posted: November 4, 2005
Title: Hidden Love
Author: Janalynn27

*****

It had been two weeks since the honoring ceremony and things were slowly returning to normal. Glorfindel and Erestor went back to their normal routines; working during the day, Glorfindel training and Erestor doing his Chief Adviser duties, then spending the evenings together, often with Lostariel. They most often read to one another, played a game of some sorts, or Lostariel gifted them with a song. Glorfindel no longer came to Erestor in the middle of the night, though he still had an occasional nightmare. He knew that he could not become dependant on Erestor, knowing full well that they were just friends, not mates.

They were sitting with Elrond and Daugion, who had become Glorfindel's second, having breakfast, just like every morning, when Glorfindel asked, "So when Elladan, Elrohir and Arwen return from Lothlórien, Elrond? I find that I miss the twins' mischievousness and Arwen's quiet grace."

Elrond smiled at his friend's affection towards his children, "In a few weeks, they are very anxious to return. They were sad to hear of Landion and really wanted to be here. They have asked about you, my friend."

Smiling a little sadly, "I will be sure to thank them for their concern when they arrive back home. Who is going to escort them back?"

"A guard of Galadhrim will bring them safely home to Imladris," Elrond said. Secretly, Elrond hoped that Haldir was among them for he had found comfort in his quiet company when Celebrían had sailed to Aman.

"I wonder if Legolas will come for a visit. Is he not visiting Lothlórien?," Erestor asked hopefully which made Glorfindel look at him, 'Did he just hear yearning in Erestor's voice?'

Elrond chuckled, "You just want a rematch at chess. I do believe he won the last time you two played."

Erestor was known for his skill at chess. None except Elrond and Glorfindel had ever beaten him. Glorfindel thought that it must have had been luck or Erestor had taken pity on him and let him win.

"Humph, he did not play fair; he cheated," Erestor scowled.

"Cheated, Legolas? I do not believe it," Glorfindel teased.

"He knew exactly what he was doing. He distracted me, flipping and playing with that golden hair of his," Erestor said with even bigger scowl.

Glorfindel's heart sank, 'Erestor distracted by Legolas's hair, surely he must be attracted by him then'. Suddenly, he lost his appetite and pushed his plate away.

Elrond noticing Glorfindel's reaction, thought deeply. He had yet to approach either him or Erestor since they had returned to Imladris, he would need to soon.

Erestor, seeing Glorfindel stop eating, frowned with concern, "Glorfindel, are you all right? You look pale."

Pasting a smile on his face he said, "I am fine, just a bit tired I suppose. I think I will go to the barracks and check on the warriors, training will start soon."

"Maybe you should rest if you are tired?" Erestor said.

"I am fine, mellon nín. I may rest after lunch," he said, then left the dining hall, or more to the point, fled.

Daugion quickly finished his breakfast, took his leave from Elrond and Erestor and followed his captain.

After Daugion left Elrond asked, "Erestor, will you come to my office this afternoon? I have some things I need to discuss with you."

"Of course, Elrond, is something amiss?" Erestor asked, still concerned over Glorfindel's hasty departure.

"No, just meet me there. I believe you have some duties to do this morning and I have some missives to read over," Elrond said as he stood to leave.

"Would you like me to arrange to have lunch brought to your office? We could discuss whatever it is over food?" Erestor asked.

Smiling, "That would be just fine. Until then, have a good morning, mellon nín."

"And you too, my Lord," Erestor smiled back.

*****

Erestor closed the book he was transcribing and stretched with a sigh. Normally the tediousness of his job would give him pleasure but lately he was filled with a restlessness he did not want to think on too much for he thought he knew the reason, or more to the point, whom the reason was.

Erestor walked into Elrond's office just when lunch was being set out. When the servants were gone Erestor sat down with a loud sigh.

Elrond looking to Erestor asked, "How has your day been so far, mellon nín?"

Pouring both of them a glass of juice, "I find I am having an unusually hard time concentrating today, and you, how is your day going?"

"It seems we have more and more refugees coming to Imladris for shelter," he said, then took a sip of the juice.

Nodding, "Yes, I worry about the increase of violence, the darkness; what do you make of it, mellon nín?"

Elrond got a distant look in his eyes and he was quiet for a few minutes. Finally coming back to himself he said, "I feel these next few centuries are going to be difficult."

Erestor, not wanting to discuss such dire circumstances during lunch, asked Elrond what he originally wanted to discuss with him.

Elrond had pondered all morning the best way to broach the subject of Glorfindel but had finally decided that a straightforward approach would be best, so without preamble, "Erestor, what are your feelings for Glorfindel?"

Erestor had his arm outstretched intending to grab a finger sandwich when Elrond's question made him snatch his hand back and stare at his friend as if he had just grown another head, "What do you mean?"

Elrond knew that this was going to be difficult, for if Erestor did have feeling for Glorfindel he was going to be very reluctant to confess them, "You know what I mean. Erestor, mellon nín. I have noticed, with growing concern, your restlessness and I had thought that possibly Glorfindel was the reason." He did not confess that he was also worried about Glorfindel, actually more so, for he was fairly certain of his feelings towards Erestor.

Erestor looked away in horror, 'Had his feelings been so transparent? Surely if Elrond had noticed them then Glorfindel had'. Then the thought that if Glorfindel had and had not said anything, then that meant that he did not love him in that way and that filled Erestor with a pain so intense, all he wanted to do was run from this chamber and hide.

Seeing his distress Elrond quickly said, "Erestor, I did not mean to upset you so, I just was worried for you. I am here for you; you are my dear friend."

Looking back into his eyes, Erestor smiled sadly and said, "What if I did love him? What would it serve me? He does not feel the same, so it does not make any difference."

"And how do you know that he does not love you, have you asked him?"

Standing up to pace, "I do not need to ask him. Elrond, Glorfindel and I have been friends for so long, not once in all these centuries has he let on that he had any stronger feelings for me than friendship."

"If you have never told him, why do you think that you can be so certain of his feelings? What if he is just as afraid as you to confess his true feelings?"

Turning quickly to look at him, Erestor asked hopefully, "Has he told you of his feelings?"

Elrond knew that he could not tell Erestor of his suspicions, because that was all they were. He would not give his friend false hope, because if he was wrong about Glorfindel's feelings he would make things worse, not better.

"No, he and I have not discussed you in that way."

"Then what is this all about, Elrond? I am not going to risk our friendship and confess my love for him. I refuse to," Erestor whispered, he hated that it made him sound the coward, but he just could not take Glorfindel's rejection.

Neither of them heard the footsteps coming down the hall or the fact that those footsteps stopped just outside the door that stood ajar.

Glorfindel had tried all morning to concentrate on his training and had a few bruises to show for his failure. His warriors looked on in shock as their captain was knocked down, for that had never happened before. So he decided, when they broke for lunch, to give them a couple of extra hours of rest and sought out the council of Elrond. He knew that he could not go on this way, and he certainly could not go to his closest friend for council, him being the reason of his predicament. Reaching Elrond's door, he was about to knock when he heard voices inside. Upon hearing Erestor's voice, Glorfindel had the intention of turning and walking away, for he did not want to face Erestor just yet, but was pulled up short with what was being said inside.

Erestor was back to pacing, "Elrond, leave this be."

"Mellon nín, I just worry about you, you must tell him of your love."

"There is no reason to. My golden elf does not love me; it would be for naught and only cause me more grief," he said trying to keep the tears at bay.

Elrond stood up and walked to the other side of his desk, "You must tell Glorfindel."

"Baw! He can never know; it would only hurt him."

Frowning, "What do you mean hurt him, how would this knowledge hurt him?"

"Elrond, Glorfindel needs my friendship too much. This would make things awkward between us. I cherish his friendship too much to wedge a barrier between us. No, he must never know of my love, it does not matter, the love is not returned. The knowledge would just hurt Glorfindel, and I will not cause him any pain. I will always love my golden elf, but nothing can come of it," Erestor said with determination.

Glorfindel could not listen to anymore; he quickly turned and stumbled through his tears to his chambers. Making his way to his bed, he threw himself down upon it as his heart tore in two. It was true, his beloved loved another, loved a golden elf, Legolas, who did not return his affection. 'How could somebody not love Erestor? His dark elf shone like a dark jewel, precious and rare'. Tears soaked his pillow as he crushed it to his face, trying to muffle the sobs that were being ripped out of him. After what seemed like forever he finally sat up and looked around wildly. He could not stay here, could not face Erestor. Then he remembered that a patrol was due to leave at anytime. Standing up quickly, he put on his armor and threw a few things in a sack, stopped by the kitchen for a few foodstuffs, and just made it to the stables when the patrol was mounting their horses.

At seeing his captain entering the stables Daugion asked, "My Lord Glorfindel, I thought I was leading the patrol out today?"

Walking over to Asfaloth he saddled him and said, "Yes you are, but I have decided to join you. The increase in orc activity on our borders concerns me greatly."

Daugion watched Glorfindel with worry. His captain had been acting peculiar since breakfast and now he looked so upset. He would need to continue to watch him and he hoped that Glorfindel would come to him; he respected him and did not like the thought of him being so unsettled.

After saddling his horse Glorfindel motioned for a stable Elfling to come to him, "Pen dithen (Little one), would you do me a favor? I need you to take a message to Lord Elrond."

The Elfling was awed by being asked to help a mighty warrior such as Lord Glorfindel. Nodding enthusiastically he said, "Of course, My Lord, anything you need."

Ruffling his hair, "Thank you, pen dithen. Would you please tell Lord Elrond that I apologize that I did not have time to tell him that I was leaving. Tell him that I will talk to him the moment that I return with the patrol."

Once he was sure that the Elfling would remember it all, Glorfindel swung up onto Asfaloth and he and the patrol headed out.

*****

Chapter 8

Erestor sat at his desk in his study, stacks of ledgers and what not piled high upon it. Erestor gave a baleful look at those stacks and had an overwhelming urge to slam his forehead down onto the desk in frustration, then had a thought of shoving them off his desk in a huff. He knew that most of his work should have, normally would have, been done yesterday. Sighing, he stood up and looked out of the huge window just behind his chair, thinking of Glorfindel. It had been three days since he had his discussion with Elrond, three days since Glorfindel left breakfast in a rush, three days since he left without a word to him. He did not know what he could have possibility done to upset Glorfindel so; he had never left before without even leaving him a note. Erestor's restlessness had increased since Glorfindel's departure and unease settled deep inside, increasing with each hour of Glorfindel's absence.

Erestor thought of all that he and Elrond had discussed and Erestor wondered if he were going to be able to go on like this. He did not understand what had changed recently, for he has loved Glorfindel from nearly the moment he laid eyes on him, the tortured golden elf that was returned to Arda against his will. His respect and esteem grew for him as he watched him adjust to the new life he had, the courage he showed as he struggled through his grief of losing everything and everyone, returning to a world so different than the one he knew before. Erestor had seen his pain and his soul cried out to befriend the golden elf. Glorfindel reluctantly let him in, and once they had become friends, they were nigh inseparable.

Sighing, Erestor thought that with a few days away from Glorfindel, he would be able to build up the walls around his heart, but was failing miserably. Suddenly a feeling of foreboding came over him and then he heard the trumpets ringing out, telling everyone that riders approached, and he knew. Something was wrong. Running from his study, Erestor rushed down the hall, down the steps and out into the courtyard, and stood there waiting for signs of the riders. When he saw the patrol galloping down the lane towards him, he sucked in his breath when he saw Daugion leading the procession with a semiconscious Glorfindel mounted in front of him on his horse. Without thinking of the crushing hoofs, he ran full force towards Glorfindel.

Daugion was hard pressed to rein in his horse before it trampled Erestor. Coming to a sudden halt, he nearly lost his hold on Glorfindel.

"Daugion, what happened? Glorfindel..." he gasped as he looked him over from head to toe, seeking out any injuries.

"My Lord Erestor, we engaged a group of orcs and Glorfindel was cut by a poisoned blade. The wound is not deep but the poison is making its way through his body. We tried to slow the poison, but none of us are healers," Daugion said, wincing at the strain in his arms from holding Glorfindel for so long.

Seeing that it was only a small wound on his side, Erestor reached up and took Glorfindel into his arms, cradling him against his chest. "Shh, mellon nín, I have you," Erestor whispered.

Glorfindel hissed out in pain then relaxed into Erestor, burrowing his face in his neck, breathing in Erestor's unique scent. He just wanted a few minutes in his arms, then knew he would need to push him away, he was too weak to hide his feeling for him, even though he was pretty sure Erestor knew how he felt.

Without faltering, Erestor carried Glorfindel up the steps and into the Healing House, while he called out for someone to have Lord Elrond to meet him there. Erestor was laying Glorfindel onto a bed when Elrond came in and started to instruct the healers in what needed to be done.

Brushing the hair off Glorfindel's sweaty brow Erestor said, "Glor, it is alright, Elrond is here, he will make you all better, mellon nín."

Glorfindel turned away from Erestor's touch and hissed in pain as he leaned against his wound. When Erestor tried to rearrange him so he lay on his back, Glorfindel fought the pain and rolled farther away from him and gasped, "Go away."

Erestor frowned, not thinking he heard him right and asked, "What, mellon nín?"

"Go away, Erestor; leave me be," he whispered, trying to keep the tears out of his voice.

Taken aback Erestor breathed, "Glor, what is it, why do you want me to leave?"

"I beg you, if you care for me at all, just leave...saes (please) Erestor," he could not help pleading.

Tears swam into his eyes and he looked up at Elrond who had been there to hear the last of what Glorfindel said.

Laying a hand on Erestor's shoulder, Elrond said quietly, "Erestor, he is in a lot of pain, he may not know what he is saying. I need to see to his wound at once and I do not think he is going to let me until you are gone. I am going to give him a sleeping draught and then take care of his wound. Go to your chambers and I will come to you as soon as I am done here."

Looking, once more, down at Glorfindel, he then knew that Elrond was right, the wound needed to be taken care of. Noticing the eyes that were watching him, he straightened and nodded once to Elrond, and then made his way out of the Healing House. Once he was well away from prying eyes, he broke into a run and reaching his chambers, slammed the door shut, and leaned his back against it. Sliding down to the floor, sobs tore from him, and he cried into his hands, his whole body shaking. 'What did I do to cause Glorfindel to push me away? Have I lost his friendship?' he thought. Erestor sat there and could not stop the flood of tears has they coursed down his face, dripping from his chin to soak his robe. He gasped for breath as his heart broke, the wound gaping wide, feeling like it was tearing him in two. Not knowing how long he sat there, he finally managed to climb to his bed, crawled into a tight ball, shaking with the cold that was settling over his soul. Exhaustion grasped him in its talons and he soon slipped into sleep, whispering Glorfindel's name.

*****

Chapter 9

Elrond stretched his aching muscles and finally stood and looked down at his patient. Glorfindel was pale and his body was flushed from a fever. It had taken over three hours to lance Glorfindel's wound and push the poison from his body. Thankfully, as long as they continue to give him tea laced with healing herbs for the next couple of days, he should make a complete recovery. The wound was not deep and would not have been anything to worry about if it had not been for the poison. Glorfindel would be weak for a few days as his body recuperated and the area around the wound was bruised from pushing the deadly poison from his body. Even though Elrond was not worried about his body healing, he was greatly concerned about his spirit. He did not know what caused him to turn away from Erestor; he would just have to talk to him when he awoke. Now he must see Daugion to ask exactly what had happened and how Glorfindel was acting while on patrol, then he needed to check on Erestor. He knew he was going to have a hard time consoling him, the stricken look he had when Glorfindel told him to leave wrenched his heart.

Turning to walk out of The Healing House, he sighed in relief when he saw Daugion waiting near the door for him. Motioning him to a quiet corner where a bench rested against the wall, he went and sat down, followed by Daugion.

"Daugion, I need you to tell me everything, starting from the day you and the patrol left, to the attack where Glorfindel was wounded," Elrond said as he leaned back against the wall.

Daugion then proceeded to tell how he observed Glorfindel's strange behavior earlier that day the patrol was scheduled to depart, then how he came into the stable just as the patrol was preparing to leave, "My Lord, Glorfindel seemed upset. During the whole time we were gone on patrol he seemed distracted and when we attacked the orcs he left his side opened which caused him to get wounded. He had never done that before."

Nodding, Elrond placed his hand on Daugion's shoulder and said, "Thank you, Daugion, and do not worry, your captain is going to be just fine. I will talk with him when he wakes and I will find out what has him so upset."

"Thank you, My Lord," he said with relief.

"Now you must go get some rest; you look very tired," Elrond said while standing. When he reached Erestor's chambers he knocked, and not hearing any answer, entered to find a sleeping Erestor tightly curled into a ball. Elrond could feel his pain even in his sleep.

Placing his hand upon his head he whispered, "Erestor, mellon nín, wake up."

Erestor stirred, looked dazedly up at Elrond, then quickly sat up, "Glorfindel?"

Sitting down on the edge of the bed, "He is fine, mellon nín. He should sleep the rest of the night and most of tomorrow away. How are you?"

Looking away he whispered, "I have been better. Elrond, I do not want anyone to see me like this."

Pulling him into a hug, "Do not worry; you take tomorrow off," when Erestor was going to protest he said, "Shh, I think Imladris can run for a day or two without its Chief Advisor. When Glorfindel wakes, I will talk to him and find out what is bothering him so and why he pushed you away. We both know that this is not like Glorfindel; there must be something truly wrong. I know Glorfindel cares for you, always has, but I am not sure just how deeply."

"Elrond, I know that Glorfindel does not love me, at least not in the way I want him to. If he did he would have never pushed me away. I just must accept it and move on. Maybe you have a missive that needs to be delivered somewhere and I could take it," he asked hopefully. 'Yes' he thought, 'time away from here, where Glorfindel was and memories would bombard him at ever turn'.

Sighing, "Erestor, you cannot run from this. Where is my strong, stubborn, courageous councilor? You will wait until I have a chance to talk to Glorfindel tomorrow."

Looking down at his lap he said, "I feel like such a coward right now," looking up at Elrond, "You must promise me that you will not tell Glorfindel of my true feelings towards him. You must promise me," he insisted.

"Do not worry, mellon nín. Now, do you want me to stay with you tonight? I do not mind."

Giving him a sad smile, "That is okay, I think I am old enough to stay by myself. Go, you look tired and I feel like I could sleep for hours. And thank you for everything, mellon nín."

Standing Elrond said, "Sleep well and I will have breakfast sent here to your chambers in the morning. I will have it left on the table just inside your antechamber so no one will see you."

"Thank you, Elrond, and you sleep well also."

"I will see you after I speak with Glorfindel tomorrow," he said then left.

After Elrond left, Erestor walked into his bathing chamber and stared at his reflection in the mirror, 'I look horrible' he thought. Drawing a bath and adding a few drops of his favorite oil, a mixture of juniper berry, rosewood and sandalwood, he then sank down into the water with a sigh. He sat there thinking on every detail that he could recall of the day that Glorfindel left until the water became chilled. While he dried off and dressed in a pair of loose leggings he still could not fathom what he did to cause this rift between them. Crawling under the covers, Erestor buried his face into a pillow and cried himself to sleep.

*****

Elrond had checked in on his patient a few times during the day and had to assure a very worried Lostariel that he was going to be well. Finally when the fever broke he advised that the sleeping draughts to no longer be given. Now Elrond was sitting in a chair at the side of Glorfindel's bed. He made sure that Glorfindel had been moved to a private chamber in The Healing House so he could speak to him when he woke, without having an audience. About fifteen minutes into his vigil Glorfindel stirred, moaning in pain as he slowly opened his eyes.

Pain nearly robbed him of breath. All Glorfindel wanted to do was to sink back into oblivion, where his body did not hurt and neither did his heart. He looked around and found Elrond sitting in a chair next to his bed with concern in his eyes.

"It is good to see you awake, mellon nín. Your fever finally broke early this morning and I had you moved into a chamber of your own so you would not be disturbed. How do you feel?" Elrond asked as he laid a hand upon Glorfindel's brow.

Glorfindel leaned into the touch; Elrond always had a comforting and healing energy that flowed from him. When he tried to speak, he found that his mouth was too dry so he managed only a croak.

"Sorry; here, take a drink of water," Elrond said as he took a cup from the bedside table and held it to his lips.

Taking a few sips, he lay back down, "I feel like I have been trampled by a few hundred oliphaunts. I am weak as an Elfling."

Knowing that Glorfindel would feel better sitting up, Elrond carefully helped him sit so he could put a few pillows behind him, "There, better?"

Nodding, "Yes, thank you."

Now that Glorfindel was well on the road to recovery he did not waste any time to start his interrogation, "Glorfindel, why did you leave with the patrol and why did you treat Erestor the way you did?"

Glorfindel looked away guiltily. He knew that he had hurt Erestor but he just was not strong enough to face him yet. He needed time to build a wall around his heart and he did not know if he had the courage to do so. 'The mighty Balrog slayer was frightened of a dark haired elf' he thought to himself, Erestor had the ability to cause him more damage than a whole army of Balrogs.

"Elrond, I do not want to talk about it right now."

Giving him no quarter Elrond demanded, "Well that is just too bad. I will not sit here and let my two closest mellyn (friends) be in such pain as you two are. I want to know of your feelings for Erestor and I will not leave here until you tell me."

Glorfindel looked at Elrond in shock. He had never talked to him in such a way; he must really be upset. Knowing that he needed to talk to someone, and in fact had originally intended to talk to Elrond, he took a deep breath and said plainly, "I love him."

Elrond sighed in relief, causing Glorfindel to frown. "Why then did you leave and then push Erestor away when you needed him the most?" Elrond asked with a frown of his own.

Looking away once again, "He does not love me in return."

"What makes you think that?"

"He said so," he said with a shudder, trying desperately to hold the tears back.

Frowning even more, Elrond asked, "When did he tell you this?"

"Well...he did not tell me to my face, but I know he loves another. I heard him say so; I heard him tell you, the day that I left."

Now Elrond was starting to understand, at least a little. "You were outside of my office, you heard us talking; obviously you did not hear all that was said," he said sternly.

"I did not mean to eavesdrop, I was coming to talk to you about Erestor and when I heard you two speaking. I turned to leave; I did not want to see him. But when I heard him say he loved Legolas it crushed me and I knew I could not stay here. I needed time away."

"Legolas?" Elrond asked in surprise.

Nodding, "Yes. I had observed Erestor speak of him a few times and that morning, at breakfast, when he spoke of his being distracted by Legolas' golden hair, that made me heartsick. But when I heard him tell you that his golden elf did not love him in return and that he did not want me to know, that it would hurt me...he knows that I love him?," he asked as a tear slipped down his cheek.

Shaking his head, Elrond wanted to shake both ellyn (pl. m. elf) until they had some sense knocked into them. "I made a promise to Erestor that I am now going to break. Glorfindel, it is you that he loves; you are the golden elf," he said as he watched disbelief fill Glorfindel's tear filled eyes. "He did not want you to know because he thinks you do not care for him other than as a friend. He knows that you depend on his friendship and he would not cause that to change. You two are the most stubborn ellyn I have ever met."

Glorfindel just sat there and stared in shock at Elrond. So many thoughts were tumbling through his mind and it finally settled onto one, 'Erestor loved him'. Wanting to run to Erestor, he threw the blankets off him and tried to stand up, only to have his body betray him.

Gently pressing Glorfindel back against the pillows, "Whoa, mellon nín, you are not ready to be walking around."

"Elrond, I need to go to him," he growled with frustration.

"If you are not careful your fever will return. If you promise to rest in your bed, I will let you return to your chambers because I know you do not like to spend too much time here in The Healing House."

Knowing that Elrond was right, but frustrated still, he settled down a bit and asked, "Once I get situated in my chambers, will you then send Erestor to me, but do not tell him anything? I want to. And I could use a bath."

Smiling down at him, "You cannot get that wound wet just yet but I can give you a sponge bath and wash your hair. Then I will carry you to your chambers and send Erestor to you."

Sighing with relief and affection Glorfindel took Elrond's hand and said, "Hannon le (Thank you), mellon nín, you are so good to everyone."

Squeezing his hand once, Elrond then went and got warm water and had servants sent to Glorfindel's rooms with food and to make sure a fire was lit and the bed turned down.

*****

Chapter 10

"You know, Glorfindel, if your body was anymore tense, I would have a very hard time carrying you," Elrond said as he carried Glorfindel out of The Healing House.

Trying to relax his body, Glorfindel whispered, "I am sorry, Elrond, it is just that I find it hard to accept that I have to be carried around as if I were an Elfling."

Chuckling, "Why not think of all the things you want to say to Erestor to get your mind off of being carried around like an Elfling."

Scowling at him, "You know, Elrond, that is not helping."

"You better be nice or I just might drop you," Elrond said with a smile.

"Humph."

When they reached Glorfindel's chambers Elrond helped him into a loose pair of leggings for sleeping and settled him into bed, "There, are you comfortable?"

"Elrond, what if Erestor is too angry to come to me?" Glorfindel asked, suddenly feeling unsure of himself. "What if I fumble things too much? I have been hiding my feelings for so long, and I am not sure what to say to him."

Sitting on the bed next to him, Elrond said, "Glorfindel, just tell him that you love him; he will forgive you anything when you tell him that. Just trust your instincts, they will guide you true."

Taking a deep breath, "Hannon le (Thank you), Elrond. I just wish I was well; I just feel so helpless right now, and I can hardly raise my arms. This is not the way I wanted to profess my devotion to him. I had many dreams of telling him how I feel and being weak as an Elfling was not one of them."

Standing up Elrond smiled down at him, "Yes, well, just think of the positive things, like when you are well. Now I will go and fetch Erestor," he started walking out and paused at the door, "Oh, and Glorfindel, no strenuous activity of any kind."

"ELROND!" Glorfindel said, blushing red.

Elrond just laughed and left.

When Elrond reached Erestor's door he knocked, not hearing any reply, entered and found a freshly bathed Erestor sitting in a chair in front of the fire. Worried by the withdrawn look in his eyes, Elrond crouched in front of Erestor and placed a healing touch upon his brow.

Blinking, Erestor looked into Elrond's eyes and was shocked with finding him in his room and in front of him, "Elrond, I am sorry. I did not hear you come in."

"Mellon nín (My friend), are you okay?" Elrond asked with concern.

Shivering, "I feel cold, Elrond. How is Glorfindel?"

"He is well, mellon nín, and resting in his chambers. He has asked to see you," Elrond said then stood, "Now, why do you not go and see him. He will need more healing herbs every few hours and I left some on the tray with the tea in his bedchamber. If you would make sure that he drinks some, I would greatly appreciate it."

"Elrond, I do not know if I can see him just yet, I mean, look at me, I am a mess."

Helping Erestor to his feet, "Trust me, mellon nín, he wants to apologize for the way he treated you. Now go to him, he still needs his rest and I know he will not until he sees you."

That got Erestor moving, hearing that Glorfindel needed rest, he could not stand the thought of him being the cause of Glorfindel's distress. He was almost to the door when he realized what he was wearing, a loose pair of leggings and a robe. Looking down at himself he said, "Elrond, I should change."

"You look fine, now hurry before Glorfindel does something stupid, like tries to get out of bed to search for you. He was quite anxious to talk with you," Elrond said as he practically pushed Erestor into the hallway.

Looking once more at Elrond, he then walked to Glorfindel's chambers only to pause at the door, his hand poised to knock. Finally gathering his courage he let his knuckles rap twice against the door and waited for a response.

Glorfindel was nervous and when he heard the knock on the door he jumped which caused him to jar his side, "Come in."

Erestor walked in and stopped just inside Glorfindel's bedchamber. When he saw the pain in his eyes he took a few steps forward, then stopped, unsure whether Glorfindel would accept his concern.

Upon seeing Erestor and how pale and fragile he looked, Glorfindel flinched inside, knowing that he was the cause of all of Erestor's pain. 'How uncertain he looks, nothing like the confident ellon (m. elf) that Erestor usually was'. Frustrated that he could not go to him and embrace him he said, "Saes, mellon nín (Please, my friend), come sit on the bed with me."

Erestor walked slowly and sat at the foot of the bed, leaning against the bedpost, "How are you, Glorfindel?"

Sighing at how Erestor seemed to be sitting as far from him as the bed allowed, he knew that he owed him more than just *I love you*.

"I have been better, you know how I dislike feeling helpless. I was so frustrated and embarrassed to have Elrond carry me to my chambers. But that is not why I wanted to see you. I must ask for your forgiveness at how I treated you upon returning to Imladris, I was confused," he said wishing that he could hold him but knowing that Erestor would not come to him until he knew how much he loved him.

Erestor just stared at him, wanting nothing more than to confess his feelings and have them returned, it was taking all the control he had left to keep from flinging himself into Glorfindel's arms, begging for him to love him.

Gathering his courage Glorfindel started his confession, "When I returned to Arda, I was grief stricken, losing everything I had loved and knew, then being sent back to a new time and no one left from my past, it was extremely hard for me. Those first few days are a blur to me except for one thing, you. You were like a thorn in my side I could not get rid of. You tenaciously kept at me, trying to get me to open up, to gain my friendship and I know that if it had not been for you that I may have not been able to make it through my grief. When I finally let you in, I still kept you just on the outside of my heart, and I do not know when or how, but you somehow wormed your way inside. When I realized that I loved you, I was frightened, knowing that you could be taken from me just as everything was taken from me before..." he whispered as emotion robbed him of his voice.

Erestor just sat there stunned; 'Did he just hear Glorfindel confess that he loved him?' "Glorfindel?"

"The next couple of centuries I tried to deny my feelings, I was so afraid, but finally I gave in, though I was cautious. Our friendship was my lifeline, I could not survive without you, so I decided to watch you, see if I could glean your true feelings for me. I had hoped that you felt the same way for me as I you, but as the time went by and not one hint that you cared for me other than a friend, I buried my love for you and went on like before, only your friend. I guess that I had convinced myself so well that you did not love me in that way that I may have not seen the signs, blinded myself from the truth. That day that I left with the patrol, I heard you talking with Elrond, I had already thought that you cared for Legolas..."

"Legolas!" Erestor said in shock.

"I know... but the way you spoke of him a couple of times recently, I thought that you cared for him and when I heard you saying you loved your golden elf, well, I did not stay to hear anything else, I ran. My heart was broken; I fled Imladris, you, and in my grief was careless. When I was brought back here, you carried me into The Healing House, I knew that I was too distraught to hide my feelings for you so I pushed you away to protect myself, and in doing so I hurt you. I am so sorry, Erestor," Glorfindel paused as he watched a myriad of emotions flit across Erestor's face until joy settled in his eyes and a huge smile lit his face, "You are so beautiful, meleth nín (my love)," Glorfindel breathed.

Erestor moved so fast that Glorfindel was not prepared for him or the pain as he launched himself into his arms and crushed him in an embrace.

At hearing Glorfindel's hiss of pain Erestor quickly released him and worry creased his brow, "I am so sorry, Glor, I did not mean to hurt you."

Smiling into the most hauntingly beautiful eyes he had ever beheld, he caressed Erestor's cheek, "I am okay, melui nín (my sweet), but you could tell me that you love me like I love you, that will make me feel better."

For the first time Erestor let his true feelings for Glorfindel come forth and shine from his eyes, "Gerich veleth nín (I love you), my golden elf."

At the look of pure love in Erestor's eyes, Glorfindel thought his heart would burst with joy and he so wanted to draw him forth so he could claim their first kiss that he frowned when his body felt like lead.

At seeing Glorfindel's frown the light started to fade from his eyes, "Glorfindel?"

Seeing his confusion and hurt Glorfindel quickly said, "Melui nín, I find myself quite impatient to taste your lips yet my body is refusing to cooperate. Ai (Ah), this is not how I wanted this to go."

Smiling, Erestor leaned against Glorfindel's chest, careful not to jar his side, and whispered against his lips, "I think I can help with this," then he was devouring Glorfindel's lips.

Glorfindel growled at the first taste of his beloved. Managing to get one arm around Erestor so he could pull him closer, he plunged his tongue into Erestor's sweetness. They kissed passionately until they both broke apart in need for breath. Panting, they stared at one another, their love cocooning them both in warmth.

Suddenly with all the emotional dishevel of the last few weeks and the injury he sustained, Glorfindel found exhaustion coming over him. He fought it, wanting to bask in the warmth of their newfound love, but was failing immensely.

Erestor, at seeing how tired Glorfindel was, stood up and pushed his robe off so it rested where it fell on the floor, and lay down next to Glorfindel under the covers.

Sighing with pleasure as Erestor snuggled up to his uninjured side he said, "This is where you belong, right here in my arms."

Smiling up at him, Erestor could not resist capturing his lips once more in a lingering kiss.

Glorfindel was tired but some parts of his body were alit with need. When he felt Erestor caress him through his leggings he broke the kiss and resting his brow against Erestor's he gasped, "What do you think you are doing?"

Erestor stared into Glorfindel's eyes, desire making them a deep blue of a turbulent sea instead of his normal crystal blue, he started to kiss a path down to his chest, "Elrond said you were in need of rest. I take your care very seriously, meleth (love), and I know that you are too tense to rest comfortably in your present condition."

When Erestor took a nipple between his teeth and nipped, Glorfindel hissed as pleasure shot to his groin where Erestor was still rubbing him through his leggings. Lacing his fingers through Erestor's hair, Glorfindel stilled him and said, "What of you, I want to pleasure you."

Looking up at Glorfindel, "Giving you pleasure gives me pleasure," when Glorfindel was going to say something, Erestor went on, "I promise when you are better I will let you have your way with me, but I want to do this for you. Let me love you, saes, meleth nín (please, my love)," he pleaded.

Not able to deny him anything, "Only if you give me another kiss," he said smiling.

Sighing, "I suppose if I have to." Laughing, Erestor kissed him senseless, then started to kiss his way back down to Glorfindel's chest. Stopping his kisses at the edge of the bandage covering the wound he looked up at Glorfindel with tear filled eyes.

At seeing the tears in his eyes he gasped, "Erestor, what is wrong?"

Searching his eyes Erestor demanded, "You must promise me, meleth nín, to never be careless again. I cannot lose you."

Glorfindel caressed his cheek and let his thumb run across Erestor's lower lip, "I promise. I have too much to live for."

Smiling once more Erestor kissed his way down to Glorfindel's navel and dipped his tongue and nipped, laughing at the moan that brought forth from his beloved. Deftly untying the laces of Glorfindel's leggings, Erestor looked once more into his eyes then touched the tip of Glorfindel's cock with his tongue, tasting the spicy taste of Glorfindel. Moaning his own pleasure, Erestor ran his tongue from base to tip, swirling his tongue around the head before taking the whole length into his mouth, sucking lightly.

Glorfindel threw his head back and groaned as the velvet heat of Erestor's mouth surrounded his member. Threading his fingers in Erestor's hair he urged him to go faster.

Moving up and down, he quickened his pace, humming as he took the whole of him into his mouth. Feeling Glorfindel ready, he swallowed as the cock filled his throat, and drank greedily as Glorfindel roared his release, making sure not to miss a drop of the precious fluid.

Glorfindel screamed as he found release, "AI! ERESTOR!"

The pleasure he gained from tasting Glorfindel caused him to find his own release as he heard Glorfindel scream his name. After licking him clean, Erestor captured Glorfindel's lips in a searing kiss.

Glorfindel gazed into his meleth's eyes with wonder, "Never have I felt such pleasure, melui nín."

Smiling down at him, Erestor said, "It is you who are sweet, spicy and sweet at the same time."

Glorfindel tried without success to keep his eyes opened, not wanting this moment to end, but soon fell asleep with a smile upon his lips.

Erestor just watched his beloved sleep for minutes, hardly believing that this mighty warrior, this beautiful faer (soul), was his. Feeling his own exhaustion, he reluctantly retied the laces of Glorfindel's leggings, then went into the bathing chamber and cleaned himself up. After putting on a pair of Glorfindel's leggings, he snuggled up next to his beloved.

*****

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