Part 16

Posted: October 2003
Author: Inwe Saralonde

*****

‘Do not waste this evening
Baby I'm begging you
Your big imagination's playing its tricks on you
If you think my up and leaving's something I'm gonna do
Feel my chest when I look at you
Baby you
You got my only heart
Yah, you got my only heart
Yah, you got my only
Only heart'
‘Only Heart' – John Mayer
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Legolas' POV

‘You're mine, Aragorn, no-one else's!'

‘…heard similar words from Haldir…someone's ‘possession'…plaything…put aside when finished with…'

The words kept going round and round in my head. So Haldir wanted him as much as I did. What did that say about Haldir – that he was possessive, like I was? Did we both see Aragorn as something to be owned? I was annoyed at myself for saying to Aragorn that he was mine. And his response was a clear indication of what he thought of *that*.

I had sought refuge in a small storage room near the kitchens – rarely used, I knew that I could remain there for a time without being discovered. Right now, I needed time to think of a way to rectify the situation. This time it was *my* turn to apologise to Aragorn – but where to start?

I had seen the honesty and sincerity in his eyes when he apologised to me in the library, and I knew that I could trust him again – I knew that he would always stand by my side.

But could I show that same degree of honesty and sincerity as well? Or would my jealousy, my possessiveness, show through? I sighed, not knowing the answer.

I sat down on one of the many boxes within the room, and promptly sneezed at the dust that I raised.

"Who's in there?" I looked up and watched the door slowly opening.

"Prince Legolas – what in all of Arda are you doing in here? One of the cooks stood in the doorway, looking at me with a slightly annoyed expression on his face.

"I was…uh, looking for something," I stammered.

"In here, ernil-nîn?" he asked, one eyebrow raised. "What could possibly be in here that you require? It is merely a storage room, filled more with empty boxes than anything else."

"Which is why I didn't find what I was looking for," I answered, a little too brightly. I made my way to the door, hoping to slip away before he asked me…

"What, exactly, *were* you looking for, ernil-nîn?" …that question…

"Um…I was looking for…uh…feathers! Yes, that's it – feathers for some new arrows I'm making." Sweet Elbereth – couldn't I have thought of anything more ridiculous?

"I see. Well, as you said, you did not find what you're looking for. Was there something else that you were wanting?"

"No…no, nothing else, thank you." I grinned a little sheepishly, and escaped as quickly as I could. ‘Wonderful,' I thought wryly, as I walked quickly down the corridor, ‘no doubt now the story will go around how the Prince of Mirkwood looks in small, dusty storerooms for feathers!' I smiled in spite of myself. So much for trying to find a refuge – obviously *that* was not it!

My smile faded as my thoughts turned back to Aragorn. I knew Ada would want to know how the talk between Aragorn and myself went, and I wasn't looking forward to telling him.

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Aragorn's POV

I was stunned. I honestly had not expected for our conversation to turn out the way it did. I was also a little disturbed by the fact that Legolas stated that I was *his*. It was bad enough hearing it from Haldir; frankly, it was worse hearing it from Legolas. I had not anticipated that Legolas could be possessive, and that worried me.

Knowing that I was expected to join the King at the dinner table, I left the library and made my way to the room given to me for the duration of my stay. I did not know whether Legolas would be there or not; if he were, then it would make for an awkward meal indeed. I sighed, and entered my room, only to find Silinde already there.

"Silinde, what is it? Why are you here?"

"I thought the answer was obvious, Aragorn. I came because I wanted to find out how it went between yourself and Legolas."

"Maybe you should be asking Legolas that question," I said.

"I would, if I could find him. He doesn't seem to be in any of his normal hiding spots and, believe me when I say, I know where they are. We've been friends for too long for me not to know."

I looked at Silinde, wondering how much I should tell him.

"I take it that it didn't go that well, hmm?" Silinde asked shrewdly.

"You could say that," I replied. "In fact, I found the whole conversation – if you could call it that – as rather…odd."

"Odd? In what way?"

"It was almost as if Legolas was playing games with me. Instead of having a sensible, rational conversation to try and sort this out once and for all, it was as if he was trying to avoid it altogether. I ended up asking him what he saw in me to try and steer the conversation back to something like normal."

Silinde raised an eyebrow. "So what did he say to your question?"

"Firstly, he countered it with the question as to what I saw in him, till I pointed out to him that it was impolite to counter one question with another. He mentioned something about my ‘honesty', my ‘supposed integrity'," I smiled ruefully, "oh, and something about courage. I confess that I didn't really listen all that well to his answer."

"I like the ‘supposed integrity'," commented Silinde.

I snorted. "I then told him how sorry I was for what happened, how this had been eating away at me, and that I knew it was eating away at him. Whereupon he told me I knew nothing of what he felt when he saw me with Haldir, and that I was his, and *his* alone."

Silinde looked at me reflectively. Continuing, I said: "I told Legolas that I had heard similar words from Haldir, and I had no interest in being someone's possession. I actually asked him if he saw me as some sort of plaything to be discarded when finished – strangely enough the King asked me if I saw Legolas as that before I went to the library to see Legolas. Legolas left the room after that."

"I see."

"You see…what, Silinde? I had not thought Legolas to be possessive – is he?" I asked.

"He can be. But you were right in telling him that you were not going to be anyone's possession." Silinde paused.

"As I have already told you, Aragorn, Legolas is jealous. And he is afraid. The two do not make a good combination. You have done all you could. You cannot keep apologising and saying you're sorry – it is up to Legolas now."

Silinde made his way to the door, and opened it, saying: "I'll leave you to freshen yourself for dinner. I can tell you now that Legolas will be there – I'm under instructions from his father to ensure that Legolas appears at the dinner table. Providing, of course," Silinde muttered under his breath, "if I can find him."

The door closed, and I was left to mull over what had transpired over the last few hours.

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Translations:

Ernil-nîn – My Prince
Ada – Father

*****

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