Posted: November 2004
Title: The (Slash) Prose
Author: Haleth Haladin
Genre: silly song
Rating: PG-13 until you get to the last few lines. (I never was good at curbing the explicitness…)
Disclaimer: I did not write the original song and bear no ill will toward whoever did write it, but I like to think that with her history of singing in gay bathhouses, Better Midler might appreciate the art of slash.

*****

[To the tune of Bette Midler's "The Rose"]

Some say slash, it is a laser
that makes you want to blink.
Some say slash, it is a razor
(And I've a hairless kink).
Some say slash, it is a hunger,
a pervy, naughty need.
I say slash, it is a flower,
and hot men are the seed.

It's the heart afraid of slashing
that never learns to shag.
Like a dreamboat who is smashing,
but fears the label "fag".
It's the fic that's not explicit,
and feels a sense of shame
about love between two misters,
that dares not speak its name.

When the story is g-rated
and the plot is sort of blah,
When you yearn for men who've mated
for the randy and the ‘gah',
just remember there are places
where the seed of hot men goes
onto other hot men's faces
and slash is all the prose.

*****

THE END

If you enjoyed this story, please send feedback to: Haleth