Posted: December 2003
Title: Red Carpet Funnies
Author: Estella Greenleaf
Type: RPS
Characters: Like everything else… (V/O)
Rating: R
Disclaimer: None of this is true. All a part of my imagination
Warning: PWP silliness. Maybe also a bit fluffy….

Author's note: Inspired by a v. interesting occurrence at the Wellington red carpet. I didn't see it, so my friend could just be ‘pulling my leg' since she was too slow to get a picture of it…. Anyway, just another drabble piece; this time funny to balance out my other depressing ones.

*****

"Are you holding what I think you're holding?" asked Orli as he noted the small white piece of ‘cloth' in Viggo's hand.

"Yes, someone in the crowd threw it at me. Figured it's rude to throw away a gift from a fan," the older man laughed as he showed off his new ‘acquisition'. It was a pair of ladies underwear with her information as well as a rather rowdy message written on the inside.

Orli giggled and said, "You're insane, you know that?"

"You're just jealous since no one threw their underwear at you. All you got is a pretty girl dressed up as Legolas," Viggo replied, still giggling madly as he hid the panties from the camera for the group picture.

"Yeah right," said Orli as he rolled his eyes. Their discussion was cut short when the photographer asked the cast to change positions for the next set of group shots.

*****

"Did you see what Viggo had in his hands?" whispered the young Brit into Bernard's ears.

"Of course. I was in the same car as him, remember?" replied Bernard in a conspiring tone. They loved playing practical jokes on each other; and the older actor could tell this was the perfect setup for one.

"I wonder if he's up for lightening the mood of this premiere parade," said Orli with a cunning smile.

"I can distract him while you make your move," replied Bernard, who was eager to take part in whatever ‘evil scheme' the young Brit had thought up.

"No need. I'll talk him into it." With that, the dark-haired actor headed towards his future ‘partner in crime'.

*****

"And you called me insane?"

"Come on, man, it's going to be great! The fans are going to have a huge laugh. The poor souls have been out here for hours in the sun. And we can't even spend that much time with them because we have to keep ‘on schedule'," pleaded Orli with his best puppy eyes.

"You're going to owe me big for this one, Orlando," replied Viggo as he shook his head at his younger friend. The glint in his eyes, however, told of his eagerness to take part in this scheme.

"But I already gave you a present!"

"And there I thought the fish hook necklace was a gift from a good friend," sighed the older actor as he pretended to look hurt.

"It IS a gift, from the bottom of my heart! Anyway, what do you want the bribe to be this time?"

"I want you to be my photography model," replied Viggo with a naughty gleam in his eyes.

"God, you're going to make me look ridiculous in those pictures, aren't you?" asked Orli in mock horror. In truth, he was really honored that his friend had asked him to model. Viggo very seldom did posed pictures; the artist much preferred his photographs to reflect the mood of the moment.

"It's only fair, considering how I'd look if I do as you ask."

"You have a deal," grinned the young Brit as he sauntered off to his golf cart for the ride back to the Reading Cinemas.

*****

Two days later

"I still can't believe the security people snatched the thing off your head before we make it to the press photographers," whined Orli as he flopped onto the bed of Viggo's hotel room in LA.

"They must have figured it's not good publicity to have the guy playing ‘Aragorn' wear a pair of underwear over his head," replied Viggo as he continued to dig through his bags for the necessary ‘accessory' for Orlando's photo shoot.

"Well, a deal is a deal. How do you want me?" asked the Brit as he batted his eyes at his friend. He had developed a crush on the older man during their long months in New Zealand. But since Viggo had seemed completely uninterested, he had made light of his feelings with over-exaggerated mock flirtations with the other man. Viggo had returned the gestures with ‘innuendos' of his own; and the two of them had grown to be the closest of friends.

"Take your shirt off, Orlando," commanded Viggo in a husky voice that made the younger man's stomach fluttered. His friend had flirted with him numerous times before, but he had never heard Viggo used such an intimate tone.

"Come again, mate?" asked the Brit with a frown, not wanting to allow his brain to assume he had a chance at winning the older man's affections.

With a jar of chocolate sauce in hand, Viggo strolled towards the younger actor. "I want to paint on you, Orlando."

"Right," replied Orli as he removed his sweater. The other man's reply had been ambiguous. He still could not tell if Viggo was just having one of his ‘moments', or if the older actor was trying to seduce him.

The artist dipped his finger into the jar, scooping up a copious amount of chocolate and began his work on Orli's chest. The young man tried his hardest to not react to Viggo's touch; but he was failing miserably. He could only hope that the older actor would not look down to see his arousal straining in his slacks.

"Molten chocolate always reminds me of you, Orlando. So warm and sweet," breathed Viggo into the younger man's ears. He had always wanted Orlando, but he never quite found the courage to risk ruining a great friendship for a try at becoming something ‘more'. But seeing the dark-haired beauty again in Wellington, he realized he would give anything for a chance to spend every waking moment with Orlando. This ‘photo session' was the perfect chance to let the younger man know how he felt.

The combination of the older man's breath upon his face and hand on his over-sensitized skin was too much for Orli to bear. Unconsciously, the dark-haired beauty closed his eyes and moaned, leaning into Viggo's touch. Whatever fears he had of rejection were long past; he wanted this to last forever. And for that, he had to risk his heart and confess his feelings. "You remember that interview where I said ‘I can't believe how this is going to make it sounds like I'm in love with you'. The truth is, I really am in love with you."

"I feel the same for you, angel," whispered Viggo, before bending to lick some of the chocolate sauce off of the younger man's smooth olive skin. "Maybe we should save the photo shoot for later."

"Yah, definitely," replied the dark-haired beauty as his hands roved over the artist's back to settle onto Viggo's backside. When the older man sighed happily against Orli's throat, the Brit whispered, "You know, the first thing I'll do tomorrow is write a ‘thank you note' to that lady fan of yours."

"Me too. Who would have thought that a pair of underwear would be the thing that finally brought us together," laughed Viggo as he guided his heart's desire to his bed. Thus began a new life for both men, happily in love.

*****

THE END

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