Once Upon A Time

Once Upon A Time

Posted: October 2005
Title: Once Upon a Time
Author: Aniroaenil
Type: FCHet
Characters: Eowyn/Haldir
Rating: R
Disclaimer: *pouts* Don't own Haldir nor any other of the gorgeous Elves the brilliant Tolkien brought to life... I wouldn't even ask money for this if it were allowed.
Timeline: After they defeat the evil Sauron, Haldir isn't dead (I know, I know, messing with the story...)
Beta: Thank you Alex for giving me my fic back (almost lost it in a computer crash.) *gets on her knees and worships her*
Author's Notes: I have nothing against Legolas, but come on the 'my-hair-is-so-pretty-role was made for him!

Summary: Parody on Snow-white, featuring: Legolas as the evil step-mom, Eowyn as the beautiful princess and Haldir as the brave knight.

*****

Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, there lived a beautiful Elf. None could match the beauty of his golden tresses. Everyday he carefully washed his hair with strawberry shampoo, then he would balm it and then he would comb it through until not a single knot was left. His name was lord Legolas. He was always busy with his hair: fondling it, playing with a strand of hair, brushing it and he even talked to the ends of his hair to keep them from splitting. He was very proud to have more beautiful hair than the Evenstar herself: Queen Arwen. Naturally, he didn't let any opportunity to remind her of that fact pass. He put his comb down and went to his magical mirror.

"Mirror, mirror on the wall, who has the most beautiful hair of them all?"

"You, my lord!" the mirror answered in awe, because he could only speak the truth and greatly admired lord Legolas's waterfall of gold.

One day, lord Legolas went to his mirror again and asked:

"Mirror, mirror on the wall, who has the most beautiful hair of them all?"

"Your hair is very beautiful!" the mirror answered in a determined voice.

"Yes, thank you!" lord Legolas beamed, he turned to leave and the mirror sighed in relief, but too soon.

"What did you say?" lord Legolas demanded.

"Your hair is very beautiful..." the mirror didn't sound so determined anymore.

Lord Legolas's eyes narrowed a fraction.

"But who has the MOST beautiful hair?"

"Well, er, you see... there's euh, you know, this... well...,"

"Go on!" lord Legolas sounded threatening.

"Human" the mirror gulped.

"A HUMAN?"

*swallow* "Erm yes,..." the mirror said with a small, very high-pitched voice.

"And...what about him?" lord Legolas sounded utterly threatening.

"Well, actually, she's a woman"

"What?" lord Legolas hissed.

"Well, actually, she's a...."

"I heard you, you oaf!" lord Legolas bellowed.

"And she, well, kind of, you know... it's all relative and..." the mirror sputtered.

"Yes?" lord Legolas was pacing impatiently around the room.

*cough* "She's got the most beautiful hair" *cough*

"I didn't hear you, what?"

*mutter* "She's got the most beautiful hair" *mutter*

"Come again?"

"She's got the most beautiful fucking hair ok!" the mirror roared.

Lord Legolas was flabbergasted. He placed his hands on either side of the mirror, narrowing his eyes as he closed in on the mirror until his flawless face was mere inches away from it. From up close, the mirror ghost could see some dandruff forming at the base of lord Legolas's hair, his eyes widened a touch.

"Who is it?" lord Legolas spat.

"Hehe, you see, it's kind of funny..." "No it's not" "...you know her..." "Doesn't matter" "... she's a friend of yours..." "Not Arwen!?" "... she's blonde like you..." "Not that chit of a Galadriel?" "...and she's a princess..." "So?" "...it's..."

"EOWYN!!!" lord Legolas exclaimed. "Damnit, I knew that girl had potential... shit, I tried to talk her into fighting all the time and get dirty and stuff, but nooooooooooooo, little missy had to go all: I have the most beautiful hair! Well, we'll see about that!!"

Lord Legolas stormed off in rage, leaving the mirror trembling and praying for the young blonde princess.

Eowyn was standing on the balcony in her room in Minas Tirith, Aragorn had wed Arwen that day. She sighed, somewhere she had hoped for a fairytale ending: Aragorn turning around swooping her up in his strong arms, riding towards the sun on a white stallion... She shook her head, it would never be. She realised it had been a mere youthful crush and she honestly wished the best for the two of them.

Still she felt a little twinge of jealousy as she thought of the beautiful elleth. She was lucky for already having her own prince charming, while she was stuck with the insufferable, whining, arrogant Elf Haldir. She grunted at the thought of him. She had found him more dead than alive and he had not uttered one word of gratitude thus far. He irked her and even worse: he knew it. In the beginning, she had been patient and kept her friendly mask in check at all times. After a while, that mask changed to cold and distant, now, she was constantly trying to hide her scowl when he was close. There was always something to complain about: the pillow's too hard, the blanket's too furry, it's too cold (even though it he can't feel), the bread is too old, the wine is not fruity enough, She understood it was not nice to be fussed over and dependent on humans, a woman at that, for an Elf, but it was getting seriously out of hand.

'Even now he's on the better hand he constantly seems to try and annoy me to death' Eowyn thought.

And then there was Faramir. She was torn between rage and profound sadness, she could've loved him. If only he had given her the chance to... But he had to go for brunettes!

'Like my hair isn't beautiful!' Eowyn thought.

"Blonds have more fun" she said to herself emptying her cup of wine in one large gulp.

"Indeed they do..." lord Legolas answered.

Eowyn started. "Legolas? I hadn't heard you... How are you?" she politely asked. '*grmbl* can't anyone have peace around here?'

Lord Legolas hated it when people didn't call him by his title, a title, he swallowed and smiled sweetly. "I am sorry my lady, I meant not to startle you" he answered. 'Of course you didn't hear me you wench, I'm an Elf!'

'Yeah right...' He looked a bit funny to Eowyn, but then again he was kind of vain, so he probably broke a nail during archery practise or something and was currently mourning for it. "It's alright Legolas, are you okay? You seem a bit... distressed."

'Look miss-I-can-fight-with-a-sword, I don't need a nurse, certainly not you!' "No, I am fine my lady, but you look a bit pale yourself. Is something wrong?"

'Nosey little Elf, mind your own business...' "Just call me Eowyn, Legolas, we are beyond titles, are we not?"

'You will never come anywhere near to what I am pathetic little human' lord Legolas shuddered imperceptibly. "Indeed we are... Eowyn"

'Ack, he says my name with that same unnerving accent Haldir has.' "I will be alright Legolas. Thanks for the concern" she smiled.

'Concern? Elbereth blondie, you are so naïve...' "Oh, then I know just the thing to lighten up your skin!"

Legolas's smile suddenly seemed a bit predatorily, but Eowyn shrugged it off as play of the moonlight on his ethereal face. '*sigh* It couldn't hurt. He obviously knows every thing there is to know about cosmetics... Maybe someone would see past the I'm-a-Shieldmaiden-of-Rohan thingy, even Shieldmaidens need to get laid...' "That sounds great!" she smiled.

'Yes! Score!' "It's very simple actually. I have a beautiful red apple here and it's one of the best things you can eat to make your skin brighten up, it's completely natural and you will most certainly find peace afterwards..."

Eowyn eyed him a bit suspiciously, but then just shrugged and took a bite from the flawless apple. She surely felt strange and frowned. She yawned once, her limbs were so heavy, she needed to sleep.

"Legolas, I... Wha...?"

The last horrifying image she saw before everything went black was lord Legolas's face contorted in a monstrous laugh. "Sleep little bitch, sleep... and never wake up again!" he cackled.

"Where is Eowyn?" Eomer asked King Elessar.

"I don't know, my dear friend, she's probably having fun..."

"That's exactly what I'm worried about..." Eomer murmured.

Aragorn laughed out loud. "Don't worry Eomer, Haldir is still in the ballroom, you mustn't fear for your sister's honour!"

"Haldir?! But she can't stand that Elf?"

Aragorn wiggled his eyebrows and concentrated on his wife. Eomer grunted and set his cup down. No matter what Elessar said, he was still worried. He knew how his sister could act after a few ales. Sighing he stood up to go search for her. He would worry about the cocky Elf later.

It didn't take him long to find her golden hair shimmering in the moonlight, sprayed across the floor. He groaned, she probably crashed there, which meant he would have to carry her all the way to her room. 'Well, at least she's alone...' When he reached her, he tried to wake her up.

"Wyn, wake up love, you need to go to bed." He gently shook her. She didn't react, he frowned, her lips seemed a bit blue. How long had she been lying here on the cold floor? He gently touched her cheek with his hand and pulled it back with a hiss. It was icy cold!

"Eowyn?" his voice was more insistent now, "Eowyn, open your eyes sister, come on!" His voice steadily grew louder. When he saw no reaction a fierce panic clenched around his heart. He thought he saw her breathe, but through his tears he wasn't sure of anything anymore.

"Aragorn!" he yelled although he knew Aragorn could never hear him through the noise of the party. He scooped her up in his arms and started running towards the feast.

Haldir heard a noise from outside the door he was leaning on. He had been all night seeing the little wench had disappeared, so he had nothing to do. Oh how he loved teasing her, seeing the fury in her eyes even before he had opened his mouth.

He frowned, unsure what is was. A man had screamed something, but it had been impossible to understand what he was saying. The sound had been panicking, but Haldir was unsure. He was about to brush it aside as a scream from a loud dispute between two drunk men, when he heard it again. It was closer now, he could clearly make out the name Aragorn this time. He quickly made his way to the King, wincing when a dancing couple bumped the scar on his back.

"King Elessar," the newly wed man turned to him with a huge smile, "there is someone down the hall calling for you." Aragorn's smile was suddenly replaced by a frown as he stood up. Right at that moment, Eomer broke through the door with a lifeless Eowyn in his arms.

"Aragorn!" he yelled again, his voice already harsh from the tears that were threatening to fall. The room instantly became quiet. Aragorn ran towards Eomer and then turned to the people: "She has had a bit to much mead, she will be alright!"

Everyone let out a sigh of relief, including Haldir. Only one person was smirking like a madman, while trying to distract Elrohir, by whispering something in the Peredhel's ear. The raven haired beauty promptly choked on his wine, making the people around him laugh. Soon everyone was chattering and having fun once again.

Aragorn ushered Eomer and Eowyn into a room with several beds and shelves filled with herbs and potions.

"Lay her on the bed." Aragorn said. He frowned, things certainly did not look good for the blonde princess. She was very cold and her breathing was very shallow. He hoped he could do something to save his friend.

"It must be some sort of poison..." Aragorn muttered.

"Poison?!" Eomer exclaimed, he could no longer stop his tears. His little sister was poisoned? "I...I did see a glass next to her..."

"Go get Gandalf and retrieve the glass, maybe he will be able to decipher what poison was used."

Eomer nodded and raced of towards the ballroom once again.

Haldir jumped when he saw Eomer race into the room with a tear streaked face. He quickly whispered something into Mithrandir's ear and the old man's _expression suddenly turned serious. Haldir frowned, if Eowyn was merely drunk, they would not need the wizard and Eomer would not be so distressed. He was distracted when a young Elleth from Rivendell asked him to dance. He had promised earlier, so he had to, but he still frowned.

Eomer returned to where he had found his sister and retrieved the glass with Gandalf. The wizard examined the contents of the glass, while Aragorn and Eomer were desperately trying to warm Eowyn up.

An hour later Gandalf said: "There is nothing here but Elven wine, she was not poisoned through her wine."

The two kings looked at him in puzzlement. If it wasn't poison, then what was it? A spell?

"Was there anything else, except for the glass?" Gandalf asked.

"I... I don't know, I don't remember" Eomer stuttered.

"We will go and look once again, stay here with her Aragorn"

Eomer and Gandalf quickly returned to the place where Eowyn had been found.

"I don't see anything..." Eomer said.

"Lie down exactly the way you found her" Gandalf said.

Eomer looked puzzled, but did as he was told. His right arm was outstretched as if he was holding something. Next to his wrist Gandalf saw a stain made by a fruit. He smelled the floor, looked up in profound sadness and stated: "Apple".

"Apple?" Aragorn said, "what's wrong with an apple?"

"No mere apple Aragorn, a lot of spells can be done with an apple..."

"Spells?" Eomer had turned completely white.

"Yes indeed my friend, I am sorry, but unless we know what the spell does, there's nothing we can do." Gandalf sighed.

Eomer stayed by his sister's bed, talking to her, trying anything to rouse her. But no avail, she would stay in her dead-like state.

Eowyn was brought back to Edoras the next morning. For weeks healers did everything in their might to awaken her, but she would not react to anything. She laid on her bed for weeks, her hair became lustreless and ashy grey, dust was assembled in her once shining tresses and nobody could do anything about it. Desperate and tired Eomer decided to call upon the Elves. Elrond and Galadriel had not yet gone to wherever it is Elves go. He sent her to Rivendell, hoping they'd find a cure for her there.

Haldir was surprised to find princess Eowyn was visiting the Last Homely House. He had had no more reason to stay in Edoras after Ellessar's wedding, so he had never gone to see her again. He already brushed his hands together, this was going to be so much fun!

His disappointment was great when he didn't see her the day she arrived. Nor the day after, nor the day after that... He decided to go look for her himself. He was kind of missing her annoying wit and her icy distance. He passed a room and he overheard Elrond and one of his sons.

"She is still in the same state?" Elrond's voice sounded worried and slightly confused.

"Yes, she is and I can't seem to be able to change the horrible state of her hair." Elrohir's voice sounded weary, "Do you think there is still hope?"

Elrond sighed, "I do not know little one, I honestly do not know... What kind of creature would do such a thing?"

In his palace, lord Legolas had just enjoyed a nice and warm mud bath and he had rinsed it all off when he decided to go to his mirror. He was humming and in his best mood, he had gotten rid of the annoying miss Middle Earth wannabe.

"Mirror, mirror on the wall, who has the most beautiful hair of them all?"

"You, my lord..." the mirror said with a twinge of sorrow in his voice. 'If only I could lie to him... Then that princess would still have prettier hair' the mirror thought. He did not even want to think about what his lord had done to her.

Lord Legolas beamed and started to comb through his hair, a devilish grin adorning his fair features.

Haldir could not believe his ears. Eowyn was sick and severely by the sound of it! He started looking in every room to find her. How much he liked to bully her, he did not wish her any harm. Three hours later he was still searching, the Last Homely House was a maze. 'I'll never find her this way... If I were to receive a severely sick person of royalty, where would I keep her? Far away from prying eyes...' Haldir sighed, he was in the quarters of the servants. "No privacy here" Haldir snorted.

'Elrond needs healing supplies nearby' but he had already searched through all the healing rooms. Except for...

"The old part of the palace!"

Haldir hurried towards the west wing of the Last Homely House. He checked all the rooms there, but after an hour or two he was about to give up. He had looked in every chamber, he leaned to a wall and groaned in frustration. He looked up to the ceiling to ask the Valar for guidance when he noticed a hatch in it. He jumped up to catch the rope hanging from it and pulled it open. He stepped on the ladder that appeared in front of him.

'This section must have been used recently' Haldir thought as he walked on the clean steps of the ladder. He came up a room that had once belonged to a woman or Elleth. There were all kinds of flowers painted on the walls and several feminine items were exposed on dust-free cabinets. There was a bathroom to his right and a sitting area right in front of him.

To his left there was a door that supposedly lead to the bedroom. He opened it and was relieved to find Eowyn lying there on the bed. Although the sun was setting and laid an orange glow over the room, she looked extremely pale and her lips had an unnatural blue-like colour. Then his eye fell on her hair, her once bright shining waterfall of tresses was now covered in dirt, dust and grime. It had lost all its golden splendour and turned into a pale grey. He was worried that she might never recover, for if lord Elrond didn't know what to do...

He looked at her face and started talking, about all the stuff he had done after he left Edoras. He thanked her for the first time for saving his life. He even joked about her pale colour and her lips. But a frown kept crossing his features. He missed her witty and bloody annoying answers, though he'd never admit that. Suddenly he looked at her hair and then at the bathroom and then at her hair and then at the bathroom again.

"Mind if I wash your hair for you puppet?" he knew that name pissed her off. He grinned and took her in his arms. He placed her next to the bathtub with her head over the side so he could wash her hair without having to soak her completely. He took some shampoo from a shelf: peach.

"Perfect scent for you, huh peaches" he said as he rubbed the shampoo in. He gently massaged her scalp and rinsed the shampoo out. He wasn't completely satisfied about the result just yet and washed it again. He dried her long tresses which had begun to look way better already and gathered her in his arms again. He sat on the bed with her in his lap and started combing her long hair all the while talking. When there was not one knot left in her hair, it had dried completely. Even though the sun had already set, he could see it's golden glow.

Haldir smiled and was very proud of himself. "Not bad for a warrior isn't it pet?" he said as he turned to her after putting the comb on the nighstand. Suddenly he realised her lips were very close to his. In the moonlight, their colour didn't seem so unnatural and appalling as in broad daylight. He brushed the hair from her face and looked at it intently. He noticed how charming and fair she really was. Normally he didn't get many chances to look at her properly, unashamed that is.

"How come I never noticed before..." he whispered. He leaned in to kiss her, when he suddenly stopped himself. What had almost happened? He laid her on the back an started pacing himself. "Pull yourself together Haldir! She's a mere mortal! A bloody annoying one at that! It was just a moment of weakness, that's all...."

He had been so occupied in his cares for Eowyn he had let his Elven guard -that was highly unneeded here anyway- down. Otherwise he would have surely sensed two sets of violet eyes watching him. Elladan and Elrohir had followed him up here to see what he would do. They sneaked back down, both shaking their heads.

"I can't believe he pulled back!" Elladan whispered when they were out of earshot, "Lady Eowyn is a very fair and decent maiden!"

"I had hoped..." Elrohir begun.

They went down, both very disappointed and already planning on matching them one day.

Haldir sat back in a chair next to the bed. 'I might as well sleep here, if I can sleep at all!' Haldir's mind had been racing all night. The thought of sleeping in a chair was not very appealing, he looked over to the bed. 'Surely she wouldn't mind if I...' He went over to the bed, hesitated, but eventually proceeded in stripping to his leggings and lying next to Eowyn.

"Nightie night princess..." he whispered. But after an hour he still hadn't driven off in reverie. If he had thought the chair was uncomfortable, this was torture. No matter how far he away from her he laid, he could always feel her body heat and it killed him. He grunted and turned around once again, only to have himself facing her once more.

"Little wench, you'll be the death of me..." he muttered as he moved closer and kissed her. He had expected her lips to be as cold as they looked. But were nice and warm, just like Haldir had imagined them to be whenever she would pout after he had commented on something she did for him in Edoras while he was healing. He lingered on her lips, wanting to hold on to the feeling. He opened his eyes, but he saw no change. He sighed and pulled her in his arms, cradling her. Her head was on his chest and he stroked her beautiful hair. He fell asleep in that position, dreaming of what could be.

Lord Legolas woke up when the first rays of the sun hit his beautiful face. He looked down at the Elf next to him.

"I guess I'll let you sleep Lindir, I kind of tired you yesterday I suppose" he smirked as he stretched. He walked over to his mirror, a robe loosely covering his gorgeous body."
"So mirror, what news is there today?" lord Legolas sang.

There was no answer and lord Legolas frowned. "Are you still asleep mirror?" Still no answer. Lord Legolas became impatient. "What the hell is going on?" he demanded.

A message appeared on the surface:

"Real beauty lives inside
But you have only pride,
Therefore Ihave left thee now
You ignorant and idle cow.
For long enough I was thy slave
It is real beauty that I crave"

Mirror

P.S. Yes, she has more beautiful hair than you, dick!

Lord Legolas's scream of agony was heard far over the distance. His power was broken, his spell had backfired making the ghost in his mirror disappear. Lord Legolas started to comb his hair to try and hush himself that way. He looked into his brush and found a large amount of hair in it. He ran his hand through his hair and it came out covered with dead tresses. A heart wrenching scream escaped his lips before he fainted. When he woke up, he found himself completely bold and he was never seen again.

The first thing she noticed when she awoke was that she was sore all over as if she had been in the same position far too long. The next thing Eowyn realised was a warm body underneath her, a warm male body. The evidence was poking her thigh. She dared not move as the memories flooded back to her. The apple, Legolas and then a blur: images of Eomer, Aragorn, Gandalf, Elrond, the twins,... Haldir. She tensed up and her breathing became shallower.

Haldir noticed Eowyn's body tense up and awoke immediately. He stayed absolutely still unsure whether he had felt it right or not. Then he tensed too as he realised he had a huge case of morning glory and it was quite impossible for her not to have noticed...If she was awake.

Eowyn's breathing became even once more and she took a deep breath and she breathed in his woodsy, male and drop dead sexy smell. 'Not a good move Eowyn! You're laying on top of an Elf, the Elf that made your life horrible for weeks on an end! Who had bullied you and made you feel like his serving wench and who had teased you and had always smiled that seducing smile every time he had you pick something up from the floor so he had a clear view of your cleavage or bum and was half naked...and looking marvellous...and smelled wonderful...and...oooh arm muscles... and...other...muscles... Stop it! Compose yourself, you are a Shieldmaiden!'

She couldn't stop herself from sighing, he was gorgeous...and aroused. And Haldir was the most amazing kisser in whole Middle Earth. "Ah, what the hell..." she muttered and she lifted her head looking up to him. His eyes seemed vacant and in deep reverie, but she was quite sure he was not asleep anymore. She remembered all too well he was roused from his sleep by the tiniest of sounds, even in a hall-way with a massive, wooden door between him and the sound.

Her lips curved in a tiny wicked smile as she shifted ever so slightly so his member poked a different part of her than her thigh. Haldir gasped and his eyes became focused immediately. Eowyn chuckled.

"I knew you weren't really asleep." she said.

"Eowyn..." was all he could say, it sounded as if it was the first time he was saying her name, with much wonder.

"That's my name." she answered dryly.

Haldir should have been annoyed with her, she had scared the living daylight out of all of them, including himself he realised, she had boldly turned them into a position in which it was very hard for him to think straight and she didn't look like she was going to change that anywhere soon. The most disturbing thing was that he didn't want her to. That admission to himself surprised him, this was quite unexpected...

"It seems as if my brave Elven warrior has lost his tongue." She was mocking him!

As an answer Haldir did something Eowyn had least expected him to do. He shook his head, one side of his mouth curling upwards. Then he ever so slowly slid his rosy, moist tongue out. Eowyn's mouth ran dry. All she could do was stare at his tongue. A small whimper escaped her lips as she realised how close his tongue was to her face.

"Now look who's at a loss of words, my witty blonde?" Haldir said, a glint of amusement in his eye.

"Let's not forget who's...on top of things" she replied, practising a little more pressure on his elfhood.

Haldir sucked in his breath, both at the movement and her boldness. There had long been a tension between them, but this was surprising... and most welcomed. He had always secretly admired the Shieldmaiden of Rohan. She had been through a lot in her short life and she had handled everything with great sense of responsibility and without a word of complaint, that's probably why he had always provoked her. He wanted to break through that outer shell. He succeeded, ironically, by being half naked in a bed with her after she had been thought to never awaken again.

"On top, yes, but can you handle it?" he teased back, "I can assure you, it's quite a handful..."

Eowyn turned slightly pink, "I bet it is, let's find out shall we?". She sounded way braver than she felt.

Haldir looked at her with a mixture of curiosity, expectance and mockery. 'So he doesn't think you dare to do it... We'll teach him!'

She looked at him very shyly, slightly flustered.

Haldir was about to say something, but Eowyn kissed him before he had the chance to. She took this moment, when he was too distracted to notice, to let her hand travel downward. She couldn't believe what she was about to do, it must be the effects of the spell...she supposed.

Haldir was completely taken aback by her kiss. Yes he had wanted to do it again, but he had never thought she would want that. She had already shocked him with her boldness and teasing. Somehow he had always seen her as an innocent, inexperienced girl...by the looks of this kiss, she was not. What he was experiencing now was nowhere near what was coming for him.

"Eowyn!" he yelped as she gripped him. His eyes went very wide as he jerked, then he squeezed his eyes shut and hissed as she playfully stroked him. She was very pleased to have shocked him and a devilish grin adorned her otherwise innocent features.

"Didn't see that one coming huh?"

'Don't speak about coming!' Haldir couldn't believe she was doing this. He must be dreaming, this was definitely the Eowyn of his dreams, surely not the shy little ShieldMAIDEN who was currently being very naughty.

Eowyn suddenly tweaked his nipple and he gasped at the sting of pain mixed with pleasure.

"Open your eyes, Elfboy"

Haldir did as he was told, still afraid this was a twisted dream, a very pleasurable twisted dream though.

"Maybe I should show you I haven't lost my tongue?"

His eyes almost popped out of his head, she was going to... she meant...really to... Then all coherent thought left his head when a warm, moist heat enveloped him.

Elrohir and Elladan had come up to check on them. During the early hours of the morning a ghost had appeared in one of the mirrors of Imladris and he had explained everything. He had also told them how to break the curse and how to make it backfire, which Elrond had already done. Elladan stopped dead in his tracks as he heard the faint noise of something rhythmically bumping into wood. He frowned and was about to say something to Elrohir, who had worse hearing, but better sight than him, when he heard the muffled sound of a female voice call out: "Oh Haldir!". He chuckled.

"What's wrong 'Dan?"

Elladan smirked and said:

"Nothing 'Roh, but I've got the faint impression they are both quite alright. Let's go."

"But..."

"I don't think we'll be needing any more matchmaking plans dear brother.

"Why?"

The two brothers walked off, a few seconds later a roar of laughter was heard ringing through the halls of the Last -very- Homely House.

*****

THE END

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