A Second Choice 5

A Second Choice

Part 5 - Transitions

Posted: March 23, 2007

*****

Elrond emerged from his corridor after a time of contemplation. He refused to talk to any about Námo’s revelations about his family. His time in Námo’s halls proceeded to settled into a routine of self contemplation and learning. He would often be found in the courtyard questioning and learning from the other Maiar. He was an adept student who learned to master different tasks with little effort. At first wary of him, the other Maiar soon granted him their trust and were glad to teach him and guide his way. At first, Eönwë or Ol ó rin would stay by his side to help him, and the others, with problems they might encounter in explaining or interpreting information. As time passed, Elrond soon learned to communicate and understand what he was shown and told. He was left alone with the other Maiar more and more as his guardians retreated and watched from a distance.

“He has progressed well. Soon he will be ready to leave these Halls and begin his physical training,” Eönwë said to Ol ó rin as he watched Elrond from across the courtyard.

“I have conferred with Namo. He says Elrond is as healed as he is going to become here. Elrond has learned to accept what cannot be changed and has dealt with most of the losses in his life. How he chooses to deal with the information about his family, only time will tell. I do not even think he knows how this will affect him. Amazingly, while he has not let go of his bitterness he has turned the pain over to Ilúvator. This is another example of his complete trust in the creator regardless of its consequences to himself. It is a task that many of our brothers and sisters have yet to conquer,” Ol órin replied.

“And has he acknowledged what will come?” Eönwë asked.

“Elrond knows that he will feel the death of his children, as he felt his brother’s death. He will need to return for a while at that time to help him accept and deal with the loss but for now he is as prepared as he can be,” Ol ó rin replied.

“I am expected at court today. I will relay Námo’s evaluation to Manwë,” Eönwë told him.

“Good, Elrond is becoming restless. As I learned a long time ago, much to my detriment, a peredhil bored and restless is an ominous thing. They attract trouble with appalling ease when not kept busy,” Olórin imparted to Eönwë.

Eönwë shook his head laughing as he looked at his friend. “You forget that I have spent time with them. That little one managed to stir up quite a few headaches with and without his brother in the camp after Melkor’s banishment. Then I had to deal with him on our travels through Arda Marred afterwards, it is the only time I have actually seen Orom ë and Tulkas want to harm one of the creator’s children. Remind me to tell you the story one day.”

“Be grateful you have not had the honor of meeting his sons. They are every inch their father all over again, and worse. I often wonder what made them choose the path they did when they are so like him. I fear that if not for the foresight granted by Ilúvator, Elrond would not have survived leaving Middle-earth without them,” Olórin told him.

“The peredhil are truly amazing creatures. They are a perfect blending of the best qualities from both kindred. Throw in the blood of a Maiar and it enhances them even more. It is a shame that such a tragic fate was chosen for them,” Eönwë said.

“Tragic yes, but every one of them made their mark in a dramatic way. Even the twins will be remembered as the utmost of warriors able to do what others could not. I wonder at the fact that of them all, exempting Elwing because of her circumstances at the time, only Elrond really wanted to choose to be numbered as one of the firstborn. It is almost as if he alone denied their true path. I know he was chosen specifically for his fate but sometimes it seems that he of all of them deserves the rest and reward of death that await the Second born. It actually gladdens my heart to see Elrond adjusting so well here among us. For the first time in his life, he finds that he is accepted without reservation because of his blood,” said Olórin.

“It makes one wonder if he wasn’t created for this eventuality from the first, and everything before was just tempering,” commented Eönwë as he left the courtyard.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

In court at Taniquetil:

Eönwë bowed before Manwë as he came into the hall.

“All is going well in the Halls?” questioned Manwë.

“Yes my lord. Olórin has conferred with Namo and has been told that Elrond is ready for release,” Eönwë responded.

“Then return with a message for Namo. Tell Namo to let Elrond discover the Hall of Elflings. He is not to spend an extended time there, just long enough to evaluate his reactions and feelings. He is to be re-embodied in the Gardens the next morning,” Manwë ordered. “Warn them that he will receive the shock of learning he has a brother in the Gardens. If Namo does not think he will respond well there, we will alter when the information is given. I feel that that information should come from his mother not us.”

“She has agreed to see him in Lórien then?” Eönwë asked, knowing of her refusal at first.

“It has been arranged that they will meet by accident there. Namo has arranged for a constant escort around Elrond until his and Glorfindel’s testing. Glorfindel also has an escort. The promoting of two to this status has attracted too much attention, both good and bad. It is best to be prepared.”

“As you wish my lord,” was Eönwë’s response as he bowed and left.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mando’s Hall

Elrond was in his corridor contemplating all he had learned recently when Namo entered.

“Your time here is short, walk with me child,” Namo said.

Elrond rose and followed Namo out the door and down the hallway. They wandered in peace for quite some time before Namo spoke.

“You have made progress quickly in my halls,” he told Elrond.

“I have tried to learn all that they will teach me my lord. I still feel that there is so much more to learn,” replied Elrond.

“Yes you have learned much but that was not of what I spoke,” Namo told him. “You have finally learned to deal with your emotions instead of hiding from them. Have you finally learned to accept the fact that you are not an elf?”

Elrond was quiet as he thought about how to respond to this question. He had always known that he wasn’t an elf no matter how much he wanted to be. That was why he had let his choice dictate his actions and life. It was with a peace he had not expected that he answered. “I have learned to accept that I am different and that I must strive to become what I am, not what I want to be.”

“And what are you Elrond?” Namo asked.

“I am Peredhel. I have been granted the powers of a Maiar but I am still a Peredhil. It is what I am supposed to be,” Elrond told him.

Namo smiled and nodded at him in agreement as he led him further down the hall.

“You are ready. When you wake tomorrow it will be under Este’s care in the Gardens,” Namo told him. “Come I have something I want you to give me an opinion on.”

Namo led him to a section of the Halls that he had not seen before. This area appeared to be quite large but had a single small doorway for entrance. Unlike other areas, here stood four guards beside the door. Elrond hesitated to contemplate who or what behind the door could possible need guarding here. Elrond passed through the doorway behind Namo and stopped in shock at the noise level. Everywhere else he had been in the Halls had been quiet and peaceful. Sure, there were shrieks and noises that came from the condemned Maiar hall but most did not go near there and probably did not even know the hall existed. But here! Here was a hall/yard filled with noise. Once he had processed the noise he began to realize where he had heard such noises before. As the realization of what this place contained sank in, the shock drove Elrond to his knees.

“So many,” he said to himself. “We failed so many.”

“No Elrond,” Namo grabbed him and shook him to gather his attention. “These are not your failures. These are the fëa of all the children lost over the ages; these are not your fault.”

Elrond just kept looking around in shock before he broke free from Námo’s grasp and ran back through the doorway. Two of the Mairan guards grabbed him as he came through the door. He struggled with them for several minutes before going limp and sinking to his knees.

“Why are they still here? They are the innocent, why have they not been reborn? Why are they being punished?” Elrond asked in confusion.

Namo knelt beside him and placed his hand on Elrond’s head. A feeling of calm invaded Elrond’s spirit as he regained his sense of self.

“Are they being punished if we keep them here for their own safety?” Namo inquired of him. “They are children, the most vulnerable. Their rebirth and release presents special problems that we have not addressed yet. Here they are safe to be the children they are without fear. We heal them when they first come here then release them into this hall until a later date. Here they find love and companionship with other children without the influence of prejudices and evil. Here the older ones are untaught the unhealthy lessons of their short lives and live as they were meant to live. Where is the wrong in this?”

“They are not meant to be here, they…” Elrond stopped as he tried to collect the thoughts swirling inside of him. “We are meant to be free until Arda’s remaking. As long as they stay within your halls, they cannot fulfill the destinies they were born to. You are preventing them from Ilúvator’s plan for them, changing their fates. If this is allowed to continue it will disrupt the flow of the song, disrupt the flow of fate. You must release them.”

Namo listened to the unspoken message of Ilúvator in Elrond’s disconnected plea. As he suspected, Elrond and Glorfindel were chosen not as a reward but as part of an elaborate plan to correct some of the evil done by Melkor. He also saw some of the many hardships ahead for the two and was saddened that more pain was to come. Placing his hand over Elrond’s eyes he pushed him into a deep sleep.

~~~~~~~

Elrond first sensed a great amount of bright light. He tried to retreat from the light as he did not want to wake. There was comfort and peace in sleep that the light disrupted. The light brought reality and pain. He tried again to retreat to the calmness of Námo’s Halls but it eluded him.

“Open you eyes, young one. It is time you were awake and became a part of the living word again,” he heard a female voice say.

The voice was comforting and brought protection and Elrond felt compelled to obey it. He slowly cracked his eyes open giving himself time to adjust to the increasing light. A shadow passed between him and the source of the light and made the adjustment easier as the light’s brightness decreased. Before him sat a beautiful Maiar, with black hair and silver eyes. He felt a connection with her and came to realize that this was his foremother, Melian. The one blocking the sun’s brightness was a silver haired ellon with startling blue eyes who stood impressively tall. He could only assume that this was his forefather Thingol.

“It is good to see you awake, little one. Your brother awoke some time ago and has been asking for you. Now that you are awake, he can visit for a few minutes while you take some nourishment. Love, will you hand me that mug of broth?” she said turning to the silver haired ellon. “Go fetch his brother while I feed him, he will not be awake long.”

Slowly she lifted Elrond’s head and gave him small sips of the warm broth. When he was done with the cup, she cleaned his face and propped him up on the pillows some.

“You can see Glorfindel for a few minutes but then you must rest again. It will take you some time to become reacquainted with your body so do not rush it. When you are ready, your body will respond. Until then, I will remain near,” Melian told him as Glorfindel came into the room.

“A short visit only young one,” she admonished him. “Remember what it was like for you when you left the halls. It will be much the same for him.”

Nodding, he sat in the chair she vacated and reached out to hold Elrond’s hand. With his mind he reached out to Elrond.

‘Can you hear me?’ he inquired.

‘Yes,’ was all Elrond responded.

‘We are brothers at last,’ Glorfindel said to him.

‘Yes we are. You did not tell me that my future sister-in-law was Námo’s daughter. She sends her love,’ Elrond told him with the shadow of a smile.

‘That warms my heart to hear,’ Glorfindel said with a silly smile upon his face. ‘You must rest now, I will be near and we can talk more later. It will take you several weeks to become reacquainted with your body. If you don’t fight it, it will go faster.’

“That is enough for now,” Melian said as she noticed Elrond’s eyes growing heavy. “Glorfindel, you need a nap also. You are going through changes too even though you did not journey to the Halls this time.”

When Elrond awoke next he was better able to control himself. He had limited movement in his extremities but he could tell it was only temporary. With help he was able to hold himself upright when placed in a sitting position. Glorfindel came and kept him company when he had completed his chores for the day. He explained to Elrond the slow process of becoming in tune with himself but assured Elrond that he would regain all of his prior abilities. Elrond’s great grandparents took care of him but requested that he hold his questions at bay, telling him to wait until he was more acquainted with himself and more self-sufficient.

Over the next week, Elrond regained his strength and abilities. He was up and walking around on the day that Eönwë and Olórin came to visit.

“Ah so you are up already, that is good,” Eönwë said as he kissed and hugged Melian in greeting. Noticing Elrond’s curious look and glance at Elwë, he laughed and told him, “I get to kiss her whenever I want, even your grandfather is not fool enough to keep me from my sister.”

“Well there goes the family,” Glorfindel said as he walked out of the house carrying a tray of drinks. Eönwë just laughed harder while Olórin just shook his head.

“So how are my favorite nephews today?” Olórin asked.

“Nephews?” Glorfindel asked in surprise.

“Yes nephews. You two have quite a family tree when you look at your lives. Ilúvator did not totally block out the family bond and that is why you two were drawn so to each other in Middle-Earth. But if you both think back, can you not agree that you both felt pulls toward Eönwë and I when we were near you?” Olórin continued.

“I do remember a pull, Glorfindel and I discussed it together once. That is when he confessed to having the same pull. If I follow through with this thought pattern, that means that Glorfindel and I were always meant to be Maiar. There really is no reward, this is what we were originally created to be,” Elrond commented.

“But why then did we have to go through all the pain and suffering? Why not make us this way to begin with” Glorfindel wanted to know. It was clear that he was becoming upset over the idea that he and Elrond might not have had to suffer so in their lives.

“Shush little one,” Elwë said as he took Glorfindel into his arms. Across the way, Eönwë was holding Elrond as he shook.

“Ilúvator does not reveal to us his plans but I can tell you two this with certainty. You two suffered what you did to make you who you are. All of your actions served to mould you and temper you into becoming the outstanding young men you are. Do not ever believe that you suffered for no reason. Ilúvator is not cruel and would not do that to another. We are responsible for our own actions and the consequences of those actions.” Melian tried to explain to them.

“All of our extended family has wondered at the suffering that you two have endured in your lives, especially you Elrond. We have come to the conclusion that you two have been singled out for a task that will require great diplomacy but also an understanding of great suffering and pain. We know not what that task is but have all agreed to help you in whatever way we can,” Eönwë told them. “Come drink and refresh yourselves. Enjoy the evening for tomorrow you will begin the next phase of your healing confrontations.”

“No!” Elrond cried out. “No, I can’t do that, not yet. I am not ready,” he said as he tried to run away.

“It is okay Elrond,” Eönwë whispered into his ear as he rocked him in an attempted to calm him down. “You will not be alone. I will stay by your side if you wish. I will protect you.”

Olórin sent a silent warning to Eönwë not to promise that Elrond would not get hurt any more. They both knew that Elrond would have to face his parents and the rest of his family to heal and move on. He was bound to get hurt in these confrontations and would need help to get through them. They also knew that they would have to keep an eye on Glorfindel. He had gone still at Eönwë’s pronouncement and also looked like he wanted to run.

“Come now; let us enjoy the rest of the evening. Boys, we have gifts for you,” Elwë said to distract them as he handed Glorfindel a beautiful golden harp inlayed with silver. Next he handed Elrond an exceptional harp made of Mallorn wood and inlayed with gold.

“Elrond, while I know you have not regained the fine muscle control needed, I look forward to hearing you play. It is said that you learned to play from Maglor himself,” Melian said as she brought a tray of light foods and placed it on the garden table.

“I received a limited amount of tutoring from him, mostly at Maedhros badgering. I think Maglor always resented that I have a gift for music while my twin did not. I know not how much you know about my upbringing, so you may not understand this,” Elrond answered her inquiry.

“We know of the harshness of your upbringing and life. I was necessary for us to know so that we could help you make the transition into your new life,” Elwë told him quietly. “We do not agree with what has happened to you and would make amends if we could.”

“The fault lies not with you so there is nothing for you to amend. I am just glad that I have some family who accept me,” Elrond replied.

“You have more family than you know who want you now, do not give the others the power over you by letting them hurt you. You are better than that,” Glorfindel ensured Elrond as he brought him over a plate of food. “Eat, you need to keep up you strength until you are totally re-tuned to your body or the process takes longer.

The group spent the rest of the night sharing silly stories and listening to Glorfindel play his harp. Elrond fell asleep in Eönwë’s arms as he watched the stars that night. It was not too much later when Glorfindel dozed off in Melain’s arms. After putting their two charges to bed, the others returned to the garden.

“They are close, maybe too close,” Eönwë remarked.

“They have been this way for years. In Imladris many thought they were a couple because they were always together. It was nothing to see them cuddled together before the fire in the Hall at night. They did not care who saw them including the visitors to the realm. Celeborn went so far as to confront them about their relationship one time when he was visiting his grandchildren. That was the night that Celeborn learned the truth about his daughter’s relationship with another. I sometimes wonder if that was not the real reason for his decision in delaying to sail,” Olórin told them.

“What kind of problems will this closeness cause them as they prepare for their trials?” Elwë asked the others. He was greatly concerned for his grandson. Elrond had had a hard life with few moments of joy interspersed. He would need to overcome much to heal and adjust.

“They will both have to learn to stand on their own again. They have become too dependant on one another. As it stands now, if we lose one it is likely we will lose both because the other will follow. I think we need to separate them and do it soon,” Eönwë told them.

“Now is not the time to separate them no matter how much they need it,” Melian told them. “They both will have a rough time in the next couple of weeks as they confront their pasts. They will heal better if they have one another to lean on during this time. Elrond especially will need Glorfindel. It will come as quite a shock to Elrond that his family does not want anything to do with him. Most of his family will not even acknowledge him.”

“Who do they meet with first?” Eönwë asked.

“Celebrían has been selected as Elrond’s first, Ecthelion will be Glorfindel’s,” came Melain’s reply.

“Elrond will do well tomorrow, he and Celebrían settled much between them before she sailed. It is a good first choice for him. I am not so sure about Ecthelion. I am unsettled about this,” Olórin said with a frown on his face.

“What unsettles you brother?” Eönwë inquired with concern.

“I know not. We will just have to wait and see,” Olórin continued.

“Until later then. I must return to the palace for a short time but will try to be back before the boys begin,” Eönwë told them as he disappeared into the night.

The others settled in to watch the stars as they contemplated what awaited them tomorrow.

*****

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